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Everyone was sitting back, enjoying lunch, and laughing hysterically at Jason’s story about his first and the cop that found them fucking in his car. He always did have this way about him, the kind of charm that could entice just about anyone. He showed the perfect example of that as he continued further with his tale. Apparently, he ended up fucking this cop, and she was the woman that turned Jason into the legend that he had become. It almost made me feel like I should search out this cop and send her a thank you card for the hours of incredible pleasure that Jason had given me in college. In fact, there were probably a lot of women that would want to send her a thank you card for that exact reason. I laughed, holding my napkin over my mouth and shaking my head as Matt and Jason bantered back and forth.
My eyes drifted from them and over to Austin, who was listening and eating his spaghetti. I studied his face and the reactions he was having to Jason’s story and the antics that were going on between Matt and him. The girls were just sitting there cracking up, looking at their respective partners with adoration and love as they talked about their firsts and the women that made them who they were. Austin seemed to have calmed down quite a bit since the last time we were all in the same room together. He was no longer searching for his phone, rolling his eyes, or scooting off into the background when the topic of sex came up. Just for the record, the topic of sex came up every five minutes with us, so hiding from it was never going to work. Hopefully, their candor and nonchalant behavior on the topic of fucking would eventually rub off on Austin so he could at least enjoy the conversation between everyone.
I was nervous watching him, though, especially since he now knew that I had seen Kristin having sex before. What he didn’t know what that I was one of the people in college that was having sex with Kristin. And Amber. And Jason, for that matter. Could I actually get up the nerve and the balls to take Austin aside and tell him the truth about my past? Before, me telling him was completely out of the question, but now, with Austin dedicated to me and the events of the cottage getting hotter and hotter by the minute, I really wanted to tell him the truth about everything.
After lunch, we all got together and formed a line in the kitchen, starting with the washer and rolling down the line until every dish was clean and put back in the cabinet. We could have used the dishwasher, but I wasn’t sure when we were leaving, and I felt better knowing everything was already done and ready for our departure. Dishes were the last thing that I wanted to have on my mind for the rest of the day. When we returned to the large room, we all walked around the space, trying to decide where we were going to land. There wasn’t a lot going on at that moment, and we all decided that it was best if we snuggled up together and took a rest. I was more than ready to lean back and just be there.
I sat down on one of the chairs and watched Austin mill around the room and peer out of the window. From the corner of my eye, I could see Matt stretching his arm up in the air and wrapping it around Amber’s shoulders. He leaned forward and kissed her gently on the cheek, smiling as he pulled away. They looked so sweet and comfortable together, and I couldn’t help but be a little jealous as Kristin yawned and snuggled even farther down into Jason’s arms. Even Kristin was getting sentimental with her husband, and there I sat, just wishing he would stop pacing the room so much. I grabbed the throw off the back of the couch and wrapped it around my shoulders, looking deep in to the flames of the fire raging in front of me, thinking about what was next. Austin looked over at me, catching me zoning out on the embers below the logs. He put his hands in his pockets and walked over, taking a seat next to me. All I wanted at that moment was to figure out a way to get rid of the tenseness in his gut. He walked around all the time like he was waiting for something bad to happen. I knew that he was just thinking about work, but to everyone else, he was the hopeless guy.
The blow job I had given Austin in the bathroom after watching Kristin and Jason fucking outside had managed to help him loosen up again, but from the look of it, all his anxiety was creeping back in, which was the complete opposite of what I was going for. Matt groaned as he pulled himself up off the couch, kissing Amber on the head and heading over to the window. He pulled the blinds down and looked outside, watching the solid white wall of snow cover any hope of getting out of there that day.
“The storm seems to be getting worse,” Matt said. “Things are starting to become very dark, which means colder weather.”
He was right. It almost looked like it was already night time outside. I pulled myself off the couch and smiled at Amber and Kristin as I walked over to the table where the Scotch was. I helped myself to another shot of the Scotch, noticing that things were starting to feel a little hazy. Maybe that was what Austin needed, enough alcohol to help control the anxiety bubbling over in him. I knew, though, that even stranded in this cabin, I wasn’t going to get Austin to agree to getting shit-faced, no matter how much I thought it might help him.
I threw back the first shot of alcohol and then poured myself another one, looking around the room at all the hammocks strung up. They actually looked incredibly comfortable, at least, more comfortable than being jammed up on the couch with four other people. I finished my second drink and then walked over to Austin, pulling him along with me to one of the large hammocks situated right next to the fire. I watched as he quietly climbed inside and put his arms over his head, and I climbed in after him, almost flipping the thing upside down.
“I just want to relax with you,” I said, putting my head on his chest.
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I could feel his breathing and hear his heart beat heavily in his chest. I really wanted him to chill out and let go of the crazy amount of anxiety that was surging through him. He worked so hard all year long, and he deserved to be comfortable and rested. The warmth of his body was definitely an added bonus, and I snuggled in tightly on top of him. We sat there for a few minutes, waiting for the hammock to stop swaying back and forth. As soon as it did, though, Austin’s body stiffened below me. It was obvious that he was feeling self-conscious about being cramped up in a hammock in front of everyone. I knew that it wasn’t the most ideal situation we could have been in, but I also knew that it was perfect for Austin since it took him out of his comfort zone and showed him the world that was around him. In my opinion, it was the best choice to get some rest out of all the other places in the open living area of the cottage.
“You know, there aren’t any other rooms for us to rest in,” I said, trying to make him understand. “We are all probably going to have to sleep in this big room together by the end of the day. At least by being up here in the hammock, we are up off the floor and all snuggled in together. I know that you aren’t feeling the lack of privacy, but the last thing I want to do is pass out on the floor or one of the couches with you. I want to feel that you are close to me.”
He sighed heavily as I snuggled in closer, putting my hand inside of his shirt and rubbing it across his hard stomach. I had a mission that I couldn’t seem to get out of my head, no matter how much it ended up affecting my own vacation. I was on a mission to help Austin relax, knowing full well that unless I pushed him, he wouldn’t do anything like that for himself. I also knew that as soon as he calmed down, he immediately started to feel more comfortable around everyone, even smiling or cracking a joke every once in a while.
“We might as well get used to sleeping here with everyone else now,” I said, finishing my thought. “Besides, you are really comfortable, and I am not willing to trade you in for the newer or fluffier model like the daybed that is laying there empty for some reason.”
“I know,” he said, reaching up and putting his hand on my head.
I could feel his muscles relaxing one by one until we were laying there intertwined above the floor. Slowly, he moved his hand up and down my head, stroking my hair like always did at home when I would lie down on his chest. I could feel the anxiety starting to build up once again, and my thoughts immediately darted back to Jason, Kristin, and Amber and all the hot nights we had spent in the apartment during college. I knew that if I was going to tell Austin about what happened, it needed to be then, where we were high enough for privacy, but not too far away from everyone else. I was hoping that Austin had the same kind of patience he did the last time I had big news for him, but I was thinking that this might be a little bit different.
“Austin,” I said, picking up my head.
“Yes,” he replied.
“So, I want to tell you something, and I want you to understand that I love you so much, and I never want that to change,” I whispered. “This all happened a long time ago, before you and I had ever even met, so it wouldn’t have affected you when we were dating, and I was afraid that if you found out, you would look at me differently.”
“Okay,” he said suspiciously. “You are starting to make me nervous.”
“I’m just going to say it,” I replied. “When I lived in the apartment with Kristin, Jessica, and Jason, we all had a little more of a relationship than just roommates and friends. We all were actually sleeping together, all of us, usually at the same time. We had this incredibly strange dynamic, and after a pretty long time of fighting it, we all just kind of gave in to it instead. None of us were in a relationship with each other, or anyone else for that matter, and satisfying our urges all together seemed like the best idea instead of going out and finding strangers. Like I said, though, it all ended the moment that I met you.”
I held my breath, hoping for an answer that wouldn’t be devastating.
Chapter 16
Austin
I laid there in the hammock with my eyes fixed on the ceiling, feeling my wife’s heart beating wildly in her chest. I felt like I was missing something, or like she’d told me a story of someone else’s life, as if she were gossiping about her friends. Things like this did not happen in my life, and if they did, they were scandals by members of the political parties I answered to, not something in my own house. I wasn’t uncomfortable that she had done this in her past, but more upset that she had kept it from me. My wife, my sweet and spicy Jessica had slept with two other women and her male roommate. I knew there was a serious fire inside of my wife. I had seen it over and over again, but I never imagined her to be the one who would be interested in sex with multiple people at once, nor did I think that she would ever keep something like that from me, especially when we were going on vacation with those very people. I rubbed my hands over my face while visions of Jessica having sex with Kristin, Amber, and Jason, all at the same time, ran through my head.
All of this was a huge revelation to wrap my head around. There were so many things that I wanted to know, but at the same time, I wasn’t sure I should know. It was a double-edged sword in the way that I wanted to know the truth, but I wasn’t sure if I could really handle the truth. I didn’t even know where to start with these kinds of questions, but the silence between us was almost painful. She sat up and looked me in the eyes, trying to figure out what my reaction was.
“How did all of it start?” I asked.
“It wasn’t planned, if that is what you think,” she said. “Obviously, there was always some sort of tension but nothing that I really paid attention to. One night, Amber and I had gone out to the bar to celebrate someone’s birthday. I don’t remember who it was. We usually didn’t leave that early from the bar, but it was kind of lame, and we both just wanted to get back to the apartment and chill. When we got back, we walked in on Kristin and Jason having sex.”
“Were they always dating?”
