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“Okay, good.”
“Good?”
She grins. “It makes your job easier. You need to find out if the age issue bothers him.”
“How am I supposed to do that?”
“Some subtle questioning. We can role play it if you want.”
I laugh. “Okay then, Asher, do you care that I’m over twenty years younger than you?”
“Absolutely not,” Paula says in an over-the-top manly voice. “In fact, I love it as much as you do. Next!”
I almost fall out of my seat laughing, the voice is so hilariously dramatic.
“As for him being more attractive than you, Autumn, I’ve told you about a million times before… you’re beautiful. Any man would be lucky to have you.”
“You have to say that. You’re my best friend.”
She smiles. “Yes, I am. But I don’t have to say it. I’m telling the truth. And for the third issue, about him having a girlfriend, you need to find that out for certain.”
“But how? And why? There’s no chance of him—”
“There is a chance of him feeling the same,” she cuts in. “You’re smart, you’re funny, caring, attractive. So please stop saying things like that.” She pauses. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to snap. I just hate the idea of you not knowing how pretty you are.”
“Thank you,” I murmur.
She told me the same all through high school when my self-esteem issues reared their unwelcome heads. But it’s always difficult to accept her words, and it’s doubly difficult to imagine that Asher would feel the same.
“Maybe you should ask him to help with something history-related,” Paula muses. “That would give you a chance to find out if he has a girlfriend, at least. If he does, you’ll know to move on.”
Her last words hit me hard.
Move on.
I’m not sure I can.
Paula doesn’t know the full extent of my feelings for Asher. She doesn’t know that, between the vignettes where he’s pressing his hard body against mine – between the dreams of his muscled chest and his firm arms – I see us as a family, on days out, or our wedding day… our wedding night.
She thinks this is just a crush. She doesn’t know how much more it is.
“I’m so glad you sent that text to the wrong person,” she says.
“I just wanted to get out of there. That guy was such a douche. At first, I thought it was just me but I kept seeing Declan traits in him if that makes sense… like little warning signals telling me he’d get controlling and cruel if we started dating. But was I imagining it? Maybe I’d see the same signs in everyone. Maybe Declan has ruined me.”
“Hush.” She places her hand on my forearm. “That douche is in the past. I’m so proud of you for leaving him.”
I press down on her hand. “Thank you.”
“Do you see those signs in Asher?”
“No!” I say, far louder than I intended. “Not even a little bit. Asher made me feel safe. I know he’d never become petty and cruel like Declan.”
“Even more reason to drop him a text…”
My eyebrows shoot up. “Now?”
“No time like the present.” She leans forward. “I’d never pressure you into doing something you’re uncomfortable with, but I also think you want to meet with him. Maybe you’re just a little nervous.”
“A little,” I repeat. “And the Grand Canyon is just a little deep. What would I even say?”
“Um, maybe ask if he can take a look at one of your essays or something? I think it should be something history-related. It gives you a good excuse if…”
If things go terribly, I mentally fill in.
“Maybe I could ask if he’ll look at my latest one. It’s due next week but it’s basically finished. Maybe he could point out a few areas for improvement.”
She claps her hands. “There you go. Do that. It’s worth a try. I know how much you like this man.”
“It just feels so strange, texting him out of the blue.”
“What’s the worst he’s going to say?”
“No,” I murmur. “That would be pretty bad.”
“Like I said, I won’t pressure you. But if you want to do this, I don’t think you should let nerves stop you. That’s my opinion.”
I take a deep breath, reaching for my phone.
“I’m going to do it. I’m going to try.”
CHAPTER SIX
Asher
I work my body hard in the gym, hefting the weights as sweat drips down my body onto the hardwood floor.
Egil sits in the doorway, watching me as he often does, probably wondering why his human is grunting and growling.
Punishing my body with an intense workout is the only way I can put Autumn out of my mind for a second.
It’s late afternoon, the day after I gave her a ride home – a day after our unlikely fate-fueled meeting – and I haven’t been able to stop thinking about her. Even now, as I throw myself into another set, thoughts of her hover at the edges of my mind.
