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sp; He scooped her up in his arms and squeezed her tight. “I can’t fix this,” he declared.
“Nope, you can’t,” she whispered. “Ross, you’re squeezing a little too tightly.”
“I’m afraid.” Her big brother, who never once had been afraid in his life, the one who made thunderstorms better, made bullies go away, beat the snot out of Todd Anders because he broke her seventh grader heart, was scared.
Sophie kissed his cheek. “I’m afraid too,” she admitted. “So is Josh. I’m sure Mom and Dad and Kai is too. We just have to stick together and see what happens to me.”
“How bad is it?” He asked. Now, he had questions. Ones she couldn’t answer, just yet.
“I don’t know yet. I should know more in few days. I had to tell you guys, before you saw me and figured out something was wrong…like you did. You, who are always the last to figure out anything,” she teased him.
He set her on the ground. Then he took her hands in his. “I have to die before you.”
She shook her head at him. Sophie put her hand on her hip and stared at him. She was only five feet two. Her brother was six feet three. She had to crane her neck to see his face. She scowled. “First of all, no one is dying. Yet. Secondly, who says?”
He scowled at her. “Natural order. I’m the oldest.”
She scoffed at him. “Oh well. You never did learn that being older doesn’t always mean that you always get your way.”
He laughed. Her brother put his head back and roared. “You’re an ass,” she informed him.
Then he stopped as suddenly as he started. “And you’re going to beat this,” Ross informed her.
“I sure am going to try. I was sitting inside watching you, watch me.” She hesitated. Then she leaned into her brother, wanting to feel his strength. Ross put his beefy, arm around her shoulder and gave her a squeeze. “I was thinking about Driver and his universe talk…” Her brother chuckled.
“I want to see that boy be great. Do great, things. I love your boys, you know that Ross, but Driver is going to be something, and I want to see it.”
“You will, lil sis. I promise. I’ll light a candle at mass Sunday morning for you and every Sunday morning until they give you the all clear that you’ve kicked cancer’s butt.”
She gazed at Ross. While she hadn’t exactly lost her faith, she hadn’t been to mass in years, not even midnight mass with Kai on Christmas Eve. “Thank you, Ross. That is sweet of you. Let’s go inside with everyone else.”
Her brother didn’t release her when they walked into Sophie’s house. Everyone was still sitting at the table. There was an awkwardness that didn’t exist before. Ross sat down at the table where he had been by Lo while Sophie went to the chair by their mother where she had been.
“Sophie, Josh has explained that you don’t really know anything yet. You’re waiting for the biopsy results. Maybe it isn’t cancer.” Her mother was reaching for hope.
“Mom, it’s cancer.” She had to be firm, so her mother didn’t get her hopes up.
“But how do you know if the results aren’t back?” Daisy asked her.
She met Heath’s eyes and saw that he too had hope. Sophie sighed. This wasn’t going to be easy. She couldn’t walk on eggshells to avoid hurting everyone’s feelings. She had to think about herself for now.
“Because the oncologist knows what she’s talking about. The biopsy will tell them what stage I have and what caused it. I have cancer,” she had to be blunt. She didn’t like that she had to keep repeating the word cancer, but she knew that she had better get used to it. It was her reality now and they all needed to get used to it too.
**
Her last hurdle for the day was talking to Ally. Her usual weekly, nighttime Skype session with her daughter was always a happy time but it wouldn’t be tonight. She knew that Ally would have a harder time with it than anyone because she was in Columbus, one hundred miles away.
Sophie was in her pajamas. The same Hello Kitty that Kai teased her about, but she was small, so she could wear kids’ clothes and she loved Hello Kitty.
She sat at Josh’s desk, his laptop turned on and waiting for Ally’s call to come through. He leaned in the doorway, bare chested in his boxers. “Need anything?” Josh asked. “The kitchen is cleaned up and the dishwasher is running.”
He looked exhausted. She smiled at him and shook her head no. “You look like death?”
Josh chuckled. “Thanks. Kind of tired. I thought I would shower and wait for you in bed unless you want me to wait here with you.”
“I’m okay. Go on.” She waved her hand at him.
“You’re sure?”
