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He made an unhappy snorting sound at Sophie. “This is exactly what I signed up for.” He got up from the bed and closed the door. “I’d expect you to do the same for me.”
Josh laid down beside her making her smile, but it just didn’t reach her eyes. The chemo was working all right. Josh knew that Sophie felt terrible. He reached out and touched her cheek, Sophie’s eyes closed when his fingers made a line down the side of her face.
“You know your stomach was always stronger than mine. When the kids had the stomach bug, you had to deal with it.”
Josh chuckled then rested his hand in the curve of her neck. “Are you saying you wouldn’t take care of me?”
She shook her head no then cringed. “I would, and you know it. I might need some help though, you’re bigger than me.”
He leaned over and kissed her forehead. “When I had appendicitis, you did just fine. Remember?”
She clung to him, her hand gripping his arm, holding him close to her, forehead to forehead. She nodded. “I would take care of you, just like then. I gagged a lot. Remember?”
“I remember that too.”
They were quiet then, holding onto each other. Holding it together, just barely. Exhausted from a long night.
**
Sophie
Sophie woke with an urgent need to pee. She glanced at Josh, flat on his back, arm thrown over his face, lightly snoring. She didn’t want to wake him.
She sat up. She was so weak. She made it the bathroom. Her body was trembling in places she didn’t know she could tremble.
She washed her hands in the bathroom sink. Brushed her teeth. Looking in the mirror, she saw what a mess she was. Not that she should care. She thought it would probably get worse before it got better.
She took her hair down and brushed it out. She needed a shower but that would have to wait until Josh was awake. He would have to help her with that much.
Tea sounded good right now. Maybe some crackers. She hoped that would settle her stomach. She shut off the bedroom light and grabbed the waste basket beside the bed. She could always put it in the garbage in the kitchen. Josh could take it out later.
In the hallway, outside their bedroom, she wobbled a bit. Her head spun a little. Maybe she should wake Josh after all. They had slept so little last night. She glanced over her shoulder at the closed door. She couldn’t wake him this early after he had been so little for the past few weeks.
Sophie headed down the hall using the wall for support. Ally was asleep on the sofa with the puppies. They saw her, scurried over her daughter and hopped down waking Ally. She stretched and yawned. She looked around for them and saw her mom, struggling.
“Mom, what are you doing?”
“I didn’t want to wake your dad. I thought I could try some tea and crackers this morning.”
Ally hopped up and grabbed the trash can out of her mom’s hand. “What do you want me to do with this?” Her nose was wrinkled in a disgusted sort of way. Sophie wanted to laugh at her daughter.
“Tie it up and put it in the garbage pan outside.”
Ally left her with the puppies yapping at her feet. She leaned against the wall, laid her face against the coolness of the painted drywall and sighed. She was weaker than she thought. It took everything she had to make it this far.
Eyeing the chair across the room Sophie wanted to make it that far. When Ally returned she could get her the tea and crackers. Sophie released the wall and stumbled across the room. She only made it a few feet before the room began to spin. Then darkness swam before her eyes before she fainted.
“Mom,” Ally was patting her cheeks. A puppy tongue licked her too. “Stop that Cleo,” Ally scolded her. She was somewhere between awake and this fog she couldn’t shake.
“Dad,” she heard Ally calling to Josh. “Dad, Mom’s passed out. I can’t wake her.”
It was a few seconds before Josh was running down the hall to her. He knelt by her side and patted her cheeks, calling to her as Ally had. “Ally grab my phone off the nightstand.”
He felt her neck. Sophie could feel his fingers pressing gently into her pulse. “Come on baby, wake up.” He sounded calmer than she knew that he was. “Thanks Ally.”
He called someone. She didn’t know who. “My wife just collapsed. She’s not responding to us. She had her first chemotherapy treatment yesterday and was sick all night.”
Josh had called emergency services. She wasn’t going to like this, but she couldn’t wake up even though her body wanted to. Her brain was listening to the things going on around her, but her eyes wouldn’t open. Her lips wouldn’t move, and form words so she could let Josh know that she was all right.
