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She pulled me into a hug. “I love you, Sophie. I love Ben. Please don’t hate me.”
“I don’t hate you, Mom. You only did what you thought was best.”
I returned her embrace, and we stayed like that for I didn’t know how long until she left.
Trying to find my bearings, I went to the neighbor’s house where Ben was playing with his friend. The little boy’s mother took one look at me, and I didn’t have to ask. She had no problem keeping Ben for the night.
I thanked her before going to find Ben. He was playing in their backyard, and I silently thanked God that he didn’t see what had happened between Jax and his father.
Playing it off like I wasn’t dying inside, I kissed Ben’s head and told him to have fun with his friend. He was busy throwing the football around and barely caught sight of me.
By the time I made it back inside, the sun was setting. My feet moved on their own accord, and before I knew it, I was standing by the door of Jax’s office. He was sitting at his desk with a drink in his hand which was unusual for him.
Jax didn’t drink, especially during the season.
Now it was my turn to stay silent, not knowing what to say or how to say it. He’d just chosen us over his own father. I couldn’t imagine what he was feeling. My heart was breaking for him. All I wanted to do was comfort him, fully aware nothing could take away the pain he was feeling.
I knew it well.
Except, he didn’t choose me like Jax just did. To my surprise, he broke the silence between us, expressing, “When we ran into each other again seven years ago, I thought this was it. This was our moment to truly be together. For the first time in my life, I believed what you had been telling me for years about destiny and soul mates.”
I swallowed hard, listening to every word he was sharing.
“I never wanted to fall in love. I saw what it did to my mother, and I refused to be that weak. I had one love, and that was football. I didn’t have to be anything for anyone. I did what came naturally to me, and I knew it was the only way I’d ever get out from under my father’s thumb. I wanted to prove to him that I didn’t need him like my mother did. That I could stand on my own without his money, his influence, and on all the important people he knows. It’s why I lived and breathed that field. Day and night, it was all that mattered to me until you came along.”
Slowly, I walked over to him. Sitting in one of the seats in front of his desk, I waited to hear the rest.
“I think my soul found yours from the second I saw you step out of that car. It was like it knew you were the one for me, and I spent years trying to pretend I didn’t love you. When in fact, I was head over heels for you.”
Suddenly, a tear escaped my eye.
“I fought against the love I had for you, and in the end, I lost you because of it.”
“Is that why you cheated on me?”
“Sophie, the only thing I can tell you right now is that I never cheated on you.”
“Jax, I was there. I saw—”
“I know what you think you saw.”
“I don’t understand.”
“I know, but you will. I promise. Can you give me that?”
I didn’t hesitate in replying, “Yes.”
I wanted to believe with everything inside of me that what he’d said was true. Holding onto that hope only made me realize how much time we’d truly lost with each other.
Finding my voice, I apologized, “I’m so sorry I kept Ben from you. I know it doesn’t change anything. I know you can’t get back the years you lost. I know it all, but now I need to tell you the truth of why I kept him from you.” Taking a deep breath, I found the courage to confess, “My dad, the man who raised me, your coach…” Tears fell from my eyes, one right after the other.
There was no stopping them. This was the first time I was sharing this with anyone.
Nothing could have prepared me for this moment and the emotions it would evoke.
“He’s not my real father.”
Jax winced, not trying to hide it.
