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Tyla laughed, only to sob out a hiccup and wipe her wet face. “I just don’t know if I can. I’m afraid to be alone.” Her gaze shifted to me. “You were so brave when you dropped Shaun flat after he slapped you. You weren’t afraid to be alone, or stand up to him, or…any of that. And I just know I never would’ve been able to do that. I would’ve given him another chance and another and another. I’m just…I’m not that strong.”
“This is so insane,” Sasha uttered, shaking her head. “I thought you and Theo were happy together.”
“Well, I had to make you think that. You and Chad are the perfect couple. It’s sickening. And I wanted to be like that.”
“Oh my God.” Sasha snorted out a laugh. “And here, I’d been depressed because it felt as if he and I were the boring old practically married couple that never did anything new.”
“Hey, you guys skipped class and had sex all afternoon last week,” I offered helpfully. “That’s not so boring.”
Sasha and Tyla burst out laughing until tears ran down their cheeks.
“We need to do this more often,” Tyla announced as she popped a Starburst into her mouth. “This is nice.”
“I know,” Sasha said, reaching out to squeeze both our thighs. “I miss just talking to you guys.”
Feeling a little too chatty, I blurted, “I sometimes don’t feel like I can talk to you because you two are, you know, so close, and I know I’m the pathetic third wheel.”
They blinked and stared at me before saying, “Really?” as if that idea had never occurred to them.
A moment later, Sasha reached for my hand. “Oh, honey. I never meant to make you feel that way. You two are equally important to me, I swear.” Then she blushed ruefully and ducked her head. “Though I guess I should confess, you kind of intimidate the hell out of me sometimes.”
“I do? What? Why?”
“Well.” She shrugged and shared a glance with Tyla, who nodded in agreem
ent. “It’s just…you’re so perfect. I mean…” She waved a hand over me. “Nothing is ever out of place—aside from the blood tonight, which just looks so strange on you, by the way—and you’re always…you just have everything under control. So I guess I do defer to telling my problems to Tyla more because she’s just so…”
“Messy,” Tyla supplied cheerfully. “I’m a fucking mess, and she can relate.”
“I’m a mess too,” I cried, pressing my hands to my chest. “I’m always doubting myself and worrying about shit and feeling out of control.”
Holy hell, I’d thought the guise I put on to appear as perfect as possible always failed, sure everyone could see straight through me. And yet…it’d faked out my two best friends, of all people.
“You sure know how to cover it up well, then, honey,” Sasha said kindly. “Because, damn…”
“Yeah, you need to work on that,” Tyla told me. “It makes us mortals feel better when we see you at your low point too…kind of like tonight. In fact, you get an A for unloading all that on us tonight.”
I smiled and nodded. “Okay, I’ll work on that.”
I guess maybe I had been the one pushing them away then, not the other way around. Realizing what kind of mess I really was, I started to apologize to them for not sharing any of my issues when my phone rang.
Seeing Colton’s name, I gasped. “Oh, shit. He’s probably been texting me all night. He said he was going to text when he got home to make sure I made it inside okay. I bet he’s worried as hell.” Holding up a finger to my girls, I answered with a breathless, “Hey, sorry. I had my text messages on vibrate only.”
“Holy shit,” he exploded into my ear. “I put my shoes back on and had my wallet in hand, ready to go back over there and check on you when I realized I hadn’t actually tried calling yet. You gave me fucking heart failure, baby doll. Are you sure you’re okay?”
“I’m fine,” I assured him. I glanced at Sasha and Tyla. “I’m actually doing great. I had a little best friend therapy and got carried away girl-talking. I totally forgot you were going to text. So, yeah, everything is fine. I didn’t mean to worry you. I guess you got home okay, too?”
“Yeah, it’s all good here. I’m not so tired anymore, especially not after worrying about you. Did you say girl-talk?” he asked, sounding suddenly interested. “Oh, Jesus. You three are hanging out on your bed in your underwear, having a pillow fight, aren’t you?”
I rolled my eyes, and Sasha snickered because she’d heard his question. A devilish gleam entered Tyla’s eyes right before she loudly proclaimed, “Let’s practice kissing again.”
“Wait, what did she say?” Colton demanded, making my roommates roll with laughter. “Maybe I should come over and check on you anyway,” he suggested.
“Goodnight, Colton,” I told him firmly, rolling my eyes. “I love you.”
I hung up on him and sent my friends an exasperated glance. “He’s such a guy.”
They were both too busy gaping at me with their mouths open to answer.
