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Her smile was rueful. “For sticking by her side when she obviously felt as if she had no one else to rely on.” She reached out and covered his forearm with a warm hand. “As much as her father and I wanted to wrap our arms around her and coddle, we needed to act tough and scare her a little, so she’d understand the severity of what had happened. But…we never dreamed it would upset her this way.” Guilt lined her features, and Cooper frowned as he studied her.
“So you never planned to give her baby up for adoption? You lied to her?”
Tara Rose flushed. “Of course we never would’ve sent our only grandchild to complete strangers.” Sniffing, she fumbled as she opened her purse and tugged out a tissue. After dabbing at her wet eyes, she blew her nose.
Inside, Coop felt hollow and alone. Jo Ellen had never needed his help; he should’ve known her family would take care of her.
Glancing at her mother, he drew in a tight breath. “She’ll be okay,” he said, speaking the words with assurance, thinking if he believed them hard enough they’d come true.
But almost as soon as he spoke, the doctor appeared in the doorway, asking for the Rawlings family. As her parents and three siblings gathered around the physician, Cooper remained stiff in his chair. The doctor’s calm and emotionless voice chilled Coop as he explained how Jo Ellen’s fetus had aborted itself.
Her baby was dead.
“She hemorrhaged a little heavier than usual for these situations, which prompted us to take a few tests. But she’ll be fine. She was, however, so upset we had to sedate her. I’ll allow two family members at a time to visit her.”
Jo Ellen’s mother and father immediately sprang forward. Her three siblings remained squished together, holding hands, as they stood frozen in the doorway of the waiting room.
When Mr. and Mrs. Rawlings and the doctor disappeared, the agony finally claimed Cooper. He bent his head nearly between his spread knees, cradled his face in his trembling palms, and wept.
He wasn’t sure how long sobs claimed him, but he sucked in a surprised breath when someone sat beside him and began to rub his back. He glanced up and was even more shocked to find Emma Leigh watching him with sympathetic but dry eyes.
He wiped at his wet face but couldn’t even remove a portion of the moisture. “Why are you consoling me?” he finally asked.
“I d
on’t know. It wasn’t even your baby, Coop. Why are you taking it so hard?”
“I don’t know.” He sniffed and studied his hands. Yeah, he would’ve liked to have a reason to insert himself permanently into Jo Ellen’s life. But now that she’d actually miscarried her child, his pain went deeper.
“She loved that baby,” he said, unable to handle knowing she’d lost something she’d loved. “When she told me your parents might take it away, she looked lost. She wanted to keep it so bad. She…she must be devastated right now.”
Emma Leigh grew quiet but continued to rub his back. “I know I’ll sound awful for saying this, but…a miscarriage was probably the best thing for her.”
He jerked back and scowled. “Yeah, you do,” he growled. “I wouldn’t talk that way around her if I were you.” This was neither the time nor the place to discuss what was best for Jo Ellen’s future; she’d just lost her child.
Em sighed and bumped her shoulder against his. It was then he realized both her brothers had drawn closer and were standing nearby, hovering with solemn expressions, as if they too wanted to offer him their condolences.
“Coop, she’s only eighteen,” Em tried again. “Having a kid right now would change her entire life. It might keep her from going to college or prevent—”
“I know that,” he snapped, “but don’t you get it? Her baby just died. Jesus, she was its mother. She must be hurting something fierce.”
Emma nodded and pressed her lips firmly together. “You’re right,” she agreed just as her parents returned.
“Emma Leigh, would you like to see her?” Tara Rose asked.
When Jo Ellen’s twin hurried to her feet, Mrs. Rawlings then glanced toward her oldest child. “Grady?”
Instead of stepping in with Emma Leigh to visit Jo Ellen, Grady instead pulled back, his attention on Cooper. “Do you want to go next?”
A tight ball of misery formed in his chest. He didn’t understand any of this. Why was Jo Ellen’s family being so nice to him? Why did he feel so suddenly inconsolable?
Instead of nodding, he shook his head. “I don’t know why she’d want to see me,” he choked out the words as he pushed to his feet. “I think…I think I’ll head home.”
He turned and walked away from her family and out the hospital’s front doors, having no idea that was as close as he’d get to the girl of his dreams for another ten years. A week later, Grady informed him that Jo Ellen had decided to spend the rest of the school year with her aunt in Reno anyway, and Emma Leigh had gone with her for moral support.
* * * *
Jo Ellen’s hands felt like ice as she rubbed them together in her lap. It made no sense. This was summer, in Texas. Nothing should be cold. But a chilly breeze from the air handler vents above blew across her shoulders, freezing her to the core.
