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Paige blinked, not quite sure how to answer. She knew more about him than anyone else at Granton knew about him. She also knew how he volunteered his time for good, honorable acts. He worked hard. He faced his biggest fears on a daily basis. He put others before himself. He’d been willing to sacrifice things he loved so Paige could get whatever she wanted without having to deal with his presence. He cleaned and wrapped bloody fingers. She felt connected to him as she did no one else since they shared some of the same aches and loneliness in life. She could tell him things she couldn’t tell anyone else. He took life too seriously and hardly ever smiled. He had the saddest yet most beautiful blue eyes she’d ever seen, and a crooked half grin that made her tummy clench with the urge to touch him. And he handled her corny teasing with a dry wit she loved. And he was too freaking gorgeous for his own good.
“I guess…I guess I know him better than I thought I did, but we haven’t…we haven’t really tried to get to know each other.” They’d been a little too busy trying to avoid each other.
Groaning over the entire messed up situation, she rolled onto her spine and thumped the back of her head on the Kayla’s bedroom carpet, once, twice, and a third time for good measure. “Not that any of that matters. Nothing will ever happen. I don’t want it to happen. I don’t even want to consider it happening.”
“Which is exactly what you’re doing now.” Kayla grinned.
Paige rolled onto her side to lob Kayla an irritated scowl. She really hated it when Kayla was right. “Nothing’s going to happen,” she stated firmly.
“Well, then I guess we should just stop talking about him then, huh.” With an impish grin, she fluttered her lashes. “Though you will name your firstborn after me, right? And it goes without saying I’m going to be the maid of honor at your wedding.”
“Oh, shut up!” With a laugh, Paige grabbed a stuffed teddy bear lying at the foot of Kayla’s bed and chucked it at her.
Kayla’s arm shot up, shielding herself, and the padded toy bounced unharmed off her arm. “Ooh, what a deadly comeback. I’m shaking in my jammies over here.”
Challenged, Paige grabbed a sock monkey. And the giggling fight was on. As immature and silly as it was, the stuffed animal war soothed Paige’s nerves. Ducking and swinging, she laughed, throwing out empty threats and basking in Kayla’s company.
But deep inside, she still worried. If Kayla knew who she was talking about, would she be so open to the idea? Would she still tease Paige about marriage and babies?
Paige didn’t think so.
She kept her brewing dilemma to herself, determined to push her growing feelings for a forbidden boy as deeply inside herself as they would go and not let them spread any farther.
Avoiding the moment she had to drive home to her dad’s house, she lingered at Kayla’s, doing total girl stuff together like painting toenails, checking out famous gorgeous guy pictures on line, talking movies, and snacking on junk food.
When she finally called it a night, Kayla walked her to her car. “Thanks for stopping by, sweetie. And call me in the morning. I want to know how the homecoming with Paul went. Besides, I want to spend every possible second with you while you’re home, maybe introduce you to my man, Archer, and go last-minute Christmas shopping together.”
“It’s a deal.” Paige hugged her friend and started home.
Chapter Twenty
LOGAN COULDN’T PINPOINT exactly what prompted him to drive home on Christmas Eve. He told himself it wasn’t because of Paige; just because he knew she was somewhere in Creighton County, he wanted to be here too. But deep inside, he recognized she was definitely a factor.
He was drawn to her light.
He drove his old secondhand truck slowly through his hometown, feeling nostalgia, depression, and a strange disconnection. While most things were exactly how they’d been before he’d left, little changes here and there made it look foreign.
He wondered when someone had torn down that old barn at the north end of town across from the school. And had the house next to the post office always been such a gawd-awful green?
Everything seemed so small. Even the streets looked narrower.
Sighing, he drove past his parents’ house. Did they still live there? They’d been there all his years of growing up, but things changed.
He’d certainly changed.
The lights were off inside; with dusk approaching, it looked empty. But he already knew it would be. He knew where his family was.
He drove to the only Christmas Tree farm in the county.
Pulling over into the drive of an abandoned gas station that had been running when he’d lived in the area, he killed the engine and slid out of his truck. Across the street, the tree farm looked busy. Festive holiday music played from speakers strategically placed along the rows of perfectly-formed firs and spruces.
Logan scanned the cars in the parking lot, but he didn’t spot his mother’s Land Cruiser. Then again, she tended to trade in every other year, so he wouldn’t know what she was driving now.
After zipping his coat up against the winter chill, he stuffed his hands into the pockets and leaned against his tailgate as he watched families leave and arrive. It amazed him how many people waited until the night before Christmas to get their tree. He’d always thought his was but a few to do this.
But seeing a young dad struggle to roll his Douglas fir onto the roof of his car while his wife held back their three toddler children told Logan how wrong he was. Many families held the same tradition as his. Twitching with the need to race across the street to help the poor guy out, Logan pulled his hands from his pockets and straightened away from his truck. He actually took a step in their direction when another family hauling their tree to a sleek black Mercedes SUV caught his attention.
For a second, he froze as he watched them, feeling royally exposed where he stood. Crouching slightly, he slunk backward along the side of his truck until a shadow concealed him.
