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I’ve never kissed anyone, but I’ve sadly watched the other morts and humans more times than I care to admit. Always jealous. Always wishing and wanting. Now, I have my opportunity.

“I’m going to kiss you,” I warn, waiting for her to indicate she doesn’t want it. I’m not a rekking Kevin no matter how much I want her in this moment.

“Are you going to keep thinking about it or what?” A challenge gleams in her blue eyes.

I smile as I drop my mouth to hers. At first, I gently peck her lips in the affectionate way I see the others often do. Then, when she gasps, I greedily lash my forked tongue out to taste her rounded one.

“Mmm.”

We both make mutual sounds of surprise. The kiss tastes sweet and addictive. Dizzying. My fingers thread into her soft hair as I take over this kiss. I want to taste her everywhere.

“Hadrian,” Theron calls out. “Let’s do this.”

Reluctantly, I pull away from our kiss, but not before playfully nipping her bottom lip.

“If Big Bird eats me, at least I can go into The Eternals knowing I got to kiss the bravest, most beautiful female on the planet,” I murmur, my eyes drawn to her now swollen pink lips.

“Please come back because I don’t want to tell everyone I kissed the only monster on the planet who got eaten by a bird.” She grins at me, lighting up her whole face. “Super embarrassing.”

I pull away and flash her my rogstud horns. “Oh, I’m coming back, sweet one. You can guarantee we’re going to do that again.”

* * *

As I shimmy down the rope to the highest point on the mountain, I can’t help but look off in the distance. It’s really high up here. Really rekking high. But it’s beautiful too. I squint, trying to see as far as I can. The Facility can’t be seen, though.

If I saw it, would I feel longing?

For her?

I wait for the familiar stirring in my gut, but it doesn’t come. The loss is sad, but not gutting. Something else is replacing the emptiness. Warm, strong, vibrant. That kiss was rekking everything.

A loud cawing startles me from my thoughts. In the distance, a flash of yellow. Big Bird. He’s back. I pat my thigh, making sure my magknife is handy. The beast took quite a beating but apparently survived the assault. Next time, I’ll cut its nog off to make sure.

Above me, the Mayvina hovers quietly. Everyone is counting on me. For communication and strength and leadership. Is this how Breccan always feels? Like the weight lies on his shoulders alone?

I drop down to the rocks and walk over to the antenna that is leaning, my mind on the one I’ve always thought of as a father. There was a time I was a lonely orphan, a mortling left when The Rades ravaged its way not only through my parents, but through our entire population. I remember crying and feeling so lost. And then, an older mortling, probably no older than I am now, scooped me into his arms and held me tight. He promised me the world. He promised me hope and love and safety. I was no longer an orphan. I was his.

Until Aria.

That’s where everything got so confusing.

I loved Breccan with all my being…and then Aria messed everything up. Rather than being angry with her, I wanted her for my own. So conflicting. But now that I’ve spent some time away from them, things feel different. I miss my father. Breccan. I miss him so bad my chest aches. And Aria, I miss her too. But not because I’m longing to have her as mine. I just miss her. As a friend.

When I get back to them one solar—if that ever happens—I will hug Breccan tight and not take another second for granted with him. Guilt threatens to consume me. I was so selfish. Breccan deserves love and a family. We all do.

Knowing Lyric is above me on the ship, I can’t help but feel invigorated. She does something to me—has since the first time I spoke to her. There’s a tether between us and I want to pull and pull and pull to see what happens when there’s finally no space in between. The urge to protect her is strong. The urge to hold her in my arms and kiss every part of her is even stronger.

I quickly set to opening the outer zutametal casing to look at the wires beneath the antenna. I’ve sat through enough of Sayer’s and Jareth’s lessons to know how to repair faulty wiring. I whistle a tune Molly taught me as I set to fixing the bad antenna. All the wires are exposed and when I touch a white one to a black one, something cackles in my comms unit.

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