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Chapter 15

Grinch

“I’ve had better,” I grunt as my hand strokes down the length of me.

Standing in the bathroom of the hotel room I’m going to be sharing with Legend, with my fist working up and down my dick in frustration is what rock bottom looks like. Toss in a heaping handful of shame and regret, and I’ve got all the makings of a creep.

I hiss as I come, ropes of despair and agitation painting the shower wall. It leaves me even more frustrated and disappointed than I was feeling before I climbed in here for a quick rinse off.

One fucking kiss. That’s all it took for those memories I’ve worked so hard to repress to come roaring back to life. She groomed me for it, talking about the way I gripped her hips, waving off the memory as no big deal by mentioning how easily she bruised.

She stoked the fire by pressing her body to mine and claiming that I always smelled so good to her.

She’s manipulating me, only this time I’m not some fool thinking he’s in love for the very first time. I have too much experience under my belt to fall for her shit again. I’ve had too many women try to weasel their way into my life, expecting some cushy position as a beneficiary on my veteran benefits or hoping to end up in the clubhouse as a claimed woman.

I won’t let her get to me this time, but at the same time, I don’t waste a second soaping my body and finishing my shower. She said she’d find a way to the station without me, and I have no doubt she will.

I towel off quickly, throwing on a change of clothes before stepping back out into the hotel room.

“Feel better?” Legend asks with a knowing smirk.

“No,” I growl as I reach for my boots.

He raises an eyebrow at me, but I refuse to talk about what he might have heard.

“I don’t know that kissing her is—”

“She kissed me,” I remind him.

“And you love her, so I doubt you backed away very quickly.”

“I don’t—I put an end to it. It doesn’t matter that she’s not in the right headspace for that or not. I’m not going there with her again.”

I pull up my boots, stand, and exit the room to go back to hers before she tries to leave without me.

His laughter follows me down the hallway.

Grace must be waiting right inside her hotel room door because she opens it the second I tap on it. She doesn’t immediately walk into the hallway. She spends a long minute looking up at me as if she can’t decide what she wants to say.

“The freesia bodywash was a nice touch,” she says.

I shrug. “I just asked Rivet to grab some stuff.”

“She got lucky with the bodywash.” She continues to watch my face. “And the brand of shampoo and conditioner. The loofah is even my favorite color.”

“Maybe you two like the same things,” I mutter. “Are you ready to go?”

I didn’t consider that she would think anything of the items I was very specific about when giving Rivet that list. I just wanted her to be comfortable. It wasn’t a bid to try to bring back any memories. I was more afraid that they were going to be items she now hated since so much time has passed.

Grace steps out into the hallway with me, and I don’t hesitate to line myself up beside her in case she needs me. Her gait is slow, but steady. I know she’s in pain, although she’ll never admit it out loud.

“I hate not having my ID or cell phone,” she mutters after I get her situated in the SUV and climb in the driver’s seat.

“Did you have them on you when…”

She lets the silence run between us, not giving an inch when I refuse to say the words. I know she had her phone on her because Max was able to locate it a block from where she was snatched. The man who took her threw it out the window while driving down the road.

“When I was abducted from the street less than two blocks from my apartment? I had my phone but not my ID.”

“I can get you another phone.”

“It doesn’t matter,” she says with a sigh. “I can remember the only number I’ve ever needed.”

I don’t know if this is her way of telling me there’s no one else important in her life other than her Aunt Diane.

“Let me know if you change your mind,” I say, instead of questioning why she still won’t allow herself to get close to anyone.

I had no clue about her childhood until Kincaid explained it back in New Mexico. Those types of conversations never came up. We were always too busy trying to get each other naked to worry about any previous trauma or life experiences. Maybe things would be different now had I taken the time to ask.

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