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“I am happy,” she tells me, before turning to Jarred and mimicking the kiss with him. “I’m very happy.” Her assurance calms me, it quiets my mind. There are so many things we still need to talk through. Tomorrow I go to the Silver Sovereign to complete my initiation. But I have a plan in mind for the three of us once I’m done. I haven’t told either of them yet, but once the ceremony is complete, I want Jarred and Zaria to join me in a ritual of our own.
I grab the body wash and squirt some onto the cloth. The foam building as I rub it along Zaria’s soft skin. The glistening droplets on her body has me smiling as I think about taking her out into the forest and showing her the game that Creed and Damien came up with all those years ago. I haven’t told her about Eloise yet. But I know I need to. Now that she’s in my life forever, she needs to know how broken I am. She needs to learn how destructive my thoughts have become over the years.
“Perhaps we should play a little game.” My gaze flicks to Jarred. The glint in his eyes tells me he knows what I’m about to say. “A little game of cat and mouse,” I whisper while I lean into Zaria. My lips brush along her ear. “Would you like that, little princess?” I coo the nickname, causing her to shiver.
“What do I have to do?” she whispers, but there’s no doubt about what the game would entail. A mouse runs while the cat catches it.
“All you have to do is run,” I tell her, my voice low and gravely at the thought of her fear racing through my veins. Even though I lost Eloise to the game, I do it anyway. I run through the woods, and I lose myself in the darkness. It’s as if I’m out there looking for a ghost I’ll never find.
“Are you sure?” Jarred asks, concern clear in his tone.
I shouldn’t do it. But Zaria needs to know what she’s getting into. “Yes.” My answer is confident. I keep my eyes on Jarred, and after a long moment, he nods. I drop my gaze to Zaria. “Would you like to play?”
“Okay,” she responds, but I’m sure it’s more to please me than it is to enjoy herself. But I’ll make sure she does. Perhaps the Haven guys would like to join. The idea of them catching her before I do has jealousy coursing through my veins like a goddamn poison.
“Then we’ll do so tomorrow night,” I tell her. When we make it back to the bedroom, I pull Zaria onto the mattress to my left. Jarred slides under the covers on my right. It feels as if I’m a king with two hearts to love. And tomorrow, with the crown in hand, I’ll become one of the Sovereign.
As we fall asleep, I realize that it won’t be long before I’m married. And before, it would have scared me, but now, I smile as sleep steals me.
24
ZARIA
The full moon is the only light offered to me to guide me through the thick expanse of trees. I wanted to do this. When Finn told me about the game, I was confident I could race through the darkness and hide from him. The only thing is, he grew up here. He knows every inch of this forest. He’s the lion, a hungry hunter, and I’m nothing more than a deer about to be devoured.
Thankfully, the black clothes I chose to wear offer some camouflage in and amongst the trees, which look like black shadows, watching over my demise. My light footsteps don’t make a sound as they carry me through the dense forest. I can’t hear him or Jarred behind me. My heart thunders against my ribs, reminding me of the life that flows through my veins.
It wasn’t too long ago that I wanted to stop that thrumming. I wanted to let go. And as I move through the darkness, I recall that night with clarity.
“Dad,” I whisper when I walk into his office. I know it’s late. There are times my father will tell me to leave, when he’s busy, but he doesn’t this time. “Can I talk to you?”
“Of course, Zaria,” he says with a smile as he gestures for me to sit. The chair opposite his desk has been something of a haven to me for most of my life. I would come in here when I needed to talk, or just for him to be a presence in his space. Dad had a calming way about him that put me at ease when I was worried. And growing up, that was a lot. “What’s on your mind?”
“I was with Mom at the country club today,” I start, still unsure of how to bring up what I overheard. I shouldn’t have listened to them talking about me. I should have stood up for myself, but I know that anytime I cause a scene, my mother is there, admonishing me. So, instead of telling them they’re liars, I listened to them laugh about my father.
