AllFreeNovel
Share Us
‘They’re not perfect.’ She smiled weakly. ‘But they’re my family, Laszlo, and I love them. I trust them too.’
‘More than you trusted me?’
His question caught her off guard and she swallowed hard. She was so tired—more than tired...she was drained. Meeting his gaze, she saw from the tension around his eyes that her answer mattered to him. It would be easier to placate him; quicker to give him some glib answer that would end this row, so she could crawl off and lick her wounds. But she was done with lying to him. No matter what the consequences, she wanted to confront the past—the whole of the past. Not keep holding back or editing out the most painful parts.
Finally, she nodded.
The gold of his eyes began to flicker with outrage.
‘What did you want me to say?’ she said, annoyed by his reaction. ‘Haven’t you learned anything from the past? Our marriage might be over but I want—’ She stopped. Her voice had turned husky with emotion but she didn’t care. ‘I need to be honest with you. And I’d like to think you want that too. So the answer is yes, Laszlo. I trusted them more than I trusted you. Or myself.’
His mouth set in a grim line, Laszlo stared at her for a long moment.
‘I want to be honest with you as well,’ he said quietly. ‘You were right to have doubts about me. Right not to trust me.’
She stared at him dazedly. ‘Wh—what do you mean?’ she stammered. She felt almost physically sick at the expression of guilt and remorse on his face.
He watched her in silence, a muscle working in his jaw. ‘I was holding back. Holding back the truth about my grandfather. And you sensed that and that’s why you didn’t trust me. Add that to all my comings and goings, and I’d say you had a very strong case for ending our relationship.’
He sucked in a breath.
‘In fact, I’m surprised you stayed with me for so long.’ His face tightened and then slowly, his hand shaking slightly, he reached out and stroked her cheek. ‘I’ve not always been a kind person, pireni. Or a fair one.’
He let out the breath.
‘When you broke up with me I blamed your uncle. And then I blamed you.’ He gave a small, tight smile. ‘And then I blamed both of you.’ He sighed. ‘But I can’t blame anyone but myself for what happened. All I did was fuel your doubts and then get angry that you doubted me,’ he said quietly. ‘Too angry to look deeper.’
He opened his mouth to say something else and then stopped.
Prudence felt her spine stiffen, her hurt somehow tempered by the inevitability of the familiar way his face closed over. Had she really expected Laszlo to open up to her? Surely she knew him well enough to know that he would always have secrets to keep.
Frowning, Laszlo glanced away from the tears gleaming in her eyes. He didn’t want to hurt her. She had been so open, so brave. But there was so much he couldn’t explain.
‘I’m sorry about everything,’ he said slowly, ‘but I’m glad we had this conversation.’ There was a moment of uneven silence, and then his face creased and he added softly, ‘And I’m glad you’re here.’
He saw the pull of his words on her face and then his chest tightened as he watched a tear trickle down her face.
‘Don’t cry!’ Impulsively Laszlo reached out and brushed his fingers gently over her cheek. Their eyes locked and then he sighed again. ‘We certainly didn’t make it easy for ourselves, did we, pireni? I just assumed that our marriage would somehow magically work, and you were convinced it would fail!’
He tilted her face to his and cupped her chin in his hand.
‘We didn’t get everything wrong, though, did we? I mean, most couples would kill to have the sort of chemistry we share.’
She knew he didn’t really mean his words to be taken seriously, but something about his remark depressed her. It was the truth, probably, she thought miserably. For Laszlo, any discussion about their relationship would always lead back to that one thing.
Glancing down at her, Laszlo frowned again. He knew he’d hurt her, and he wanted more than anything to pull her into his arms, but much as he desired her he suddenly didn’t want to use sex to blot out emotion.
‘Look, don’t worry about the cataloguing.’ He paused and took a breath. ‘I’m going to ring your uncle later and talk it all through with him. You don’t think he’ll recognise my voice, do you?’
Prudence hesitated a moment, her grey eyes searching his face. She knew he was trying to make amends and it was novel at least to have Laszlo be the one to make a peace offering. Shaking her head, she gave him a weak smile. He grinned at her and his obvious relief that he had made her smile made her heart wobble.
‘Good. I don’t want him charging over here to rescue you.’ He paused. ‘You don’t want to be rescued, do you?’
Prudence shivered. Of course she didn’t—but it might have been better if she had. Her feelings were becoming more and more confused, and harder and harder to contain.
She shook her head. ‘No. I don’t want to be rescued.’
His face flushed and she felt her pulse start to quicken, for he looked heartbreakingly like his younger self.
