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1
Doe
Fighting a yawn, I took a sip of my strong-brewed coffee and kept my gaze on the horizon, knowing any minute now the best part of my day was about to happen. Even as I fought the flare of guilt and embarrassment that what I was doing was creepy, I tucked a few locks of hair behind my ear and waited, my eyes trained on the path where Jenner ran every morning.
Life on a farm was busy, starting well before dawn, but ever since I’d figured out Jenner’s running schedule, I’d been getting up even earlier so I could get a glimpse of him. My daily dose of perfect before the rest of the day turned to crap. It had been the same for the past year, and if I had to miss this moment for any reason, I wouldn’t feel comfortable in my skin for the rest of the day.
A glance at the watch on my wrist told me it was almost time before I cupped both hands around my mug. Lifting it to my nose, I savored the scent of dark roast with the perfect amount of flavored creamer to fight the bitter taste, while still giving me enough of it to remind my brain it was time to function.
Taking another sip, I enjoyed the heat as it hit the back of my throat and warmed my chest on its way down just as the figure appeared in the distance. I licked my lips—to get a drop of coffee off them, not because my mouth had gone dry in anticipation. That was the only reason…or so I told myself every morning.
I watched from my place on the porch, hidden by the shadows, as Jenner’s body got closer with each passing second. He was wearing white basketball shorts and a matching T-shirt, but his arms were so covered in ink they blended into the predawn darkness. As he got closer, the few streetlights that were placed along the path from our property to Luca Thornton’s illuminating his way, I saw that he was already drenched in sweat. He had his earbuds in, listening to what I imagined was an energetic playlist to keep him going on his 5K run.
At the end of the trail, which was about thirty feet from the house, he stopped. Bending over, he placed his hands on his knees, but his breathing didn’t seem overly labored, considering how far he’d already run. His gaze was on the house, his brows pulled together in a glower. He always did that, glaring at my family home like he couldn’t figure it out. I secretly fantasized that he was looking for me, craving a glimpse of me just as I did of him.
He couldn’t possibly know that I was sitting there watching, wishing he would come up onto the porch and speak to me. Of course he didn’t. He never did, but a girl could hope.
Jenner stood there for a full minute before straightening and turning back the way he’d just come. As he disappeared into the distance, my heart felt heavy, my moment of perfection gone until the next morning.
Sighing, I drained my mug and forced myself to stand. At least a hundred different things required my attention before Mom would be up making breakfast, and I needed to get to it.
After a brief meeting with our foreman, I spent the next few hours feeding the animals. Next to seeing Jenner, this was my second-favorite part of the day. I preferred to be around animals more than I did the majority of the human population. They didn’t judge me or make me feel like a freak.
Growing up, the kids at school always made me feel like the odd one out. My brothers, as star baseball players, were popular. Between the three of them, they basically ruled the school halls. And then there was me. The quiet girl who would rather be in jeans and a flannel than any of the outfits the majority of the girls my age preferred. None of them understood how I could be related to Jackson, Bryant, and LJ, let alone be part of the infamous Niall quads.
My brothers tried to protect me, but I didn’t let them see half of how hellish my life was in school—or around our small town. It was why I tended to keep to the farm or a few select other nearby properties. If my brothers had known what it was like for me, they would have been in fights constantly, and then their baseball dreams would have been out the window. I wanted to protect them just as much as they wanted to protect me.
When the last of the animals were fed, I washed up in the barn and went to have breakfast with my parents. Now that the boys were off to college, it was just the three of us. It made things considerably quieter around the house. I’d always thought it would be nice not to have to shout to be heard over those three, but honestly, I’d realized fairly quickly that it was more lonely than anything else.
“Morning, sweetheart,” Mom greeted as she straightened from taking a pan of homemade biscuits out of the oven.
“Morning,” I murmured, rushing over to help her. “Everything smells delicious, Mom.”
“Sit, sit,” she laughed, shooing me away from the stove. “I’ve got this. You’ve been working hard all morning.”
“I was only feeding the babies,” I excused, carrying the platter of bacon over to the kitchen table. Opening the fridge, I grabbed the carafe of fresh orange juice and set it beside the bacon before grabbing three small glasses for us. Once the juice was poured, I took the coffeepot and started filling Dad’s mug before doing my own.
“You’re so good with them, Doe,” Mom praised. “Are you sure you don’t want to do the veterinary program? You would be so good at it.”
I took my place at the table, trying to swallow the knot that was already forming in my throat. “Mom, I told you why I can’t do it.”
“Death is inevitable, Dorothy,” she reminded me. “You can’t avoid it.”
“No,” I agreed. “But I don’t have to deal with it on a daily basis.”
She pressed her lips into a hard line. “I blame Dr. Cartwright. If he had just waited to put down that poor horse instead of doing it right in front of you the day you were shadowing him…”
“I still wouldn’t have become a vet,” I told her firmly. “Subject change, please.”
Blowing out a heavy sigh, she set a dish of scrambled eggs in front of me. “All right, all right. Violet called right before you came in. She and Luca are going on a double date with Shaw and Jagger tonight. She was hoping you would babysit Love Bug for them.”
I paused in the act of lifting the serving spoon of eggs. “Yes, of course I will,” I assured her. “You know I adore Love Bug. And it’s not like I have anything else to do tonight.”
Or any night, for that matter, I thought with a mental grimace.
She beamed at me as she took her own seat. “That’s what I told Violet. Be over at their place at seven.”
I gave her a small smile and finished scooping the serving of eggs onto my plate. Snatching a little extra bacon, I sat back to eat just as my dad came in. Picking up my mug of coffee, I averted my gaze as he bent his huge body to kiss my mom deeply. Sometimes I felt like a third wheel now that it was just me with the two of them.
They had never been shy about PDA, but since my brothers had left for college back in August, they had gotten even more handsy with each other. Most of the time, I thought they were adorable. Gross, sure—these two people were my parents—but they’d been married for over twenty years, and they still couldn’t keep their hands to themselves.
But it also made me realize what I was lacking in my life. Other than family, I had no one special to me. No best friend, no boyfriend. It was just me and this farm, and I was beginning to wonder if that was enough.
Finally, Dad let Mom up for some air. With a smirk on his face, he took his place at the table while Mom fanned herself with her hand. Licking her kiss-swollen lips, she picked up the platter of bacon and offered it to her husband.
Feeling the sexual tension in the room, I quickly ate my breakfast and made an excuse to get the heck out of there. “I’m going into town for those supplies Bert ordered,” I told them as I grabbed the keys to the truck. Ugh, I was even willing to deal with the people in town to get away. I really needed to get a life of my own. “Do either of you need anything while I’m out?”
“Yes, please, sweetheart,” Mom said, pointing her fork at the fridge. “Could you grab everything off that shopping list for me?”
“No problem,” I muttered, already mentally preparing myself to walk into the grocery store. West Bridge only had one, and it seemed as if every time I had to walk into that place, every person who liked to torture me was there.
I snatched the list off the pad and folded it before stuffing it into the pocket of my jeans. “Anything else?”
“I think that’s everything,” she said with a kind smile.
“See you later,” I told her as I dropped a kiss on top of her head. “Call if you need something.”
“Be careful,” Dad cautioned. “It’s supposed to storm later.”
“Yes, sir.” With a wave, I left through the kitchen door. We had a multi-car garage that was detached and stood about twenty yards from the house. Inside, my brothers’ vehicles were gathering dust. Bryant’s Range Rover and LJ’s Jeep sat side by side. Walking past them, I felt my heart ache from missing them, but it was Jackson’s truck that made me stop and send a message in our group text.
Me: I’m thinking of running away from home.
Three messages hit the screen almost simultaneously.
Bryant: Do it!
LJ: Do it!
Jackson: Come stay with us. I miss you!
Laughing, I put my phone back in my pocket and climbed into the farm truck, barely giving my own car a glance before backing out of the garage. If nothing else, I know those three could put a smile on my face.
