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“So it’s okay to run to me for a quick feel better fuck but not for what you really need?”
“Damn it, can we not do this today!”
“Oh we are. Right here, right now.” I pulled the door open and he slammed it, turning me back to face him.
Dallas
Now
“This is it! I’ve lost my patience! I’m not fucking around anymore! This was never some ploy to get you back into my bed Dallas! This is me telling you I want the rest of your life, to father your children. I’m him. Fight it all you want, but I’m that guy.”
All the blood drained from my face and my heart burst.
“Funny, our history speaks differently! You were going to marry someone else and you have an entire floor of nurses ready to take her place!”
“Those women, or whomever you think I have anything residual with were on borrowed time. Even my own fucking fiancée knew I was in love with someone else…Those days were long over the day I got serious with you. Damn it, woman, you are not easy to love, and I can’t keep—” He cut himself off, taking a step forward so there was no space between us, his face twisted as he breathed in deep. He looked at me again, studying me before he continued. “If for some reason I’m truly wrong about us, Dallas, if I truly am delusional, why are you crying?”
“I’m not.” My voice cracked and I realized my face was becoming soaked. Angry with the body betraying me, I lashed out. “I won’t let you hurt me like that again. I’m trying with you. I’m trying! But stop thinking about what you want for one damn minute and think about me! I can’t let myself put all my hope into you again. It nearly destroyed me!”
He shook his head angrily. “I am thinking about you, have only thought about you for years. So if I’m being a little selfish, I don’t give a shit. You,” he said emphatically so I snapped my attention to him, “it’s very simple…belong with me.” I let out a lo
ng breath as I continued to cry. He didn’t move, but his next words hit me with a force that almost leveled me. “I don’t have a choice in this anymore than you do. We can’t keep running from what we both know in our hearts is the truth. It’s ridiculous to think we can move on with anyone else. I’ve tried. I couldn’t do it. And neither could you. Denying what we have damn near ruined us both. I’m no longer willing to lie to myself and haven’t been in a long time. We were right the first time.”
His hands gripped my neck as he gently stroked my throat as he leaned in. “”We got it right the first time. We just fucked up a little along the way. We weren’t perfect—never have been—but we were beautiful. We still are.”
Our eyes locked as he tilted my head up and held it.
“I loved you then. I love you now. I’ll love you tomorrow. And if you walk away from me, not one damn woman in the world will ever take your place. No one ever has. I had to learn, Dallas. It took some time. Please, just let go, forgive me, and let me love you.”
“You walked away,” I reminded softly. “You didn’t even look back.”
“All I did was look back, but I won’t ever walk away again,” he promised, his tone serious, hopeful.
“I didn’t think you would then.” My face still in his hands I threw a weak argument his way. My resolve already falling apart with every word he spoke. “We don’t get along Dean, we never really have.”
“Bullshit, and besides, that’s the way we work, but I’m not going to stand here and convince you, Dallas Whitaker. I shouldn’t have to because you have always loved me, too. You promised me you would.” He leaned in closer and wiped my new tears away with his thumbs, gently re-gripping my head and bringing me to him.
“I know what I said,” I murmured.
“I love you, Dally, so much, so completely, so purposefully. I don’t think it was ever unintended. I think I knew exactly who I wanted my heart to belong to.” He pressed his lips to mine, gently separating them before gliding his tongue across my mouth. Once I opened, he devoured me in a passionate kiss, tasting me, taking me. Pulling away only enough to say his next words, his lips grazed over mine with soft kisses in between.
“Tú tienes la otra mitad de mi corazón, y no puedo vivir sin ella.” Before I could ask him, he told me the meaning. “You have the other half of my heart and I can’t live without it.” He gripped my shoulders, his forehead to mine. “You are the other half of me. Tell me how to fight for you, baby. Tell me what to do. I’ll do whatever you want. Don’t take my life away from me. Forgive me.”
“I already have,” I confessed. “I just haven’t forgiven myself.” Honesty was the only thing I could give him as the last of my walls came crashing down around me. He straightened to look at me as he held me close, the pain etched all over his beautiful features. It was surreal that this beautiful, passionate man loved me.
“When you do, Dallas, whenever you are ready, I’ll be there. I won’t hurt you again. I only want to make it last. I want to keep my promise. I want to marry you, to put more babies inside you. I can’t wait to start trying. Ever since you told me, it’s all I think about. It’s all I want, a life with you. The life we planned on.”
I nodded then leaned in, giving in completely to my need for him. I wrapped my arms around him giving him the only thing I could, complete surrender without words. He held me tightly to him as we made love with our mouths, deeply and without restraint. When we pulled away, we were both panting with need and renewed arousal. We were interrupted by a door knock and pulled away quickly before it opened.
“Dr. Martin, Dr. Nelson is on line four,” the nurse said, taking a quick peek into the room.
“Thank you,” he said, dismissing her without looking her way.
On guard that the lead oncologist was on the phone, I took as step toward Beatrice’s ultrasound and pointed. “This is my case,” I said firmly, meeting his eyes.” Don’t even think about talking to him about it. I mean it. I have to answer to him and I am not ready yet.”
“Dallas, you are so involved—”
“Please trust me,” I begged. “She called me here. She wants me. I love her. I want to help her. She’s like family to me, but you know I can handle this.”
