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Nerves racked my body as I led Sawyer to my bedroom and shut the door behind us. There still wasn’t a lock on the door—something I’d need to talk to Maddox about sooner rather than later—but it didn’t matter because Maddox had agreed to keep his family at Dallas and Nolan’s house for the night if things went the way I’d planned.
Sawyer moved into the middle of the room and stopped. He wrapped his arms around his body. I moved to the nightstand and put the gun in the drawer and then reached for the small lamp on the nightstand. The second the light came on, Sawyer murmured, “Leave it off, please.”
A part of me really wanted to give in to his request. But Sawyer had been hiding for a long time. The darkness would probably make him feel a little less vulnerable, but it would also let him keep part of himself from me.
I left the light on and moved so that I was next to Sawyer. My heart felt like it was in my throat when I whispered the same words to him that he’d spoken to me the day that he’d changed the trajectory of my life without even knowing it.
The same day he’d broken my heart.
“Do you trust me, Sawyer?” I asked.
I swore I heard him whimper. But instead of responding with his voice, he answered me with his body. In one fluid move, he turned and eased himself down onto my lap and then his arms were going around my neck. As he buried his face in the crook of my neck, I put my arms around him. The whole thing should have been awkward and uncomfortable considering my wheelchair, but nothing had felt more natural in my life. He wasn’t a small man by any means, but it felt like his body had been made to fit mine.
“I knew it would be like this,” I admitted as I ran one hand up and down Sawyer’s back.
Sawyer pulled back a little, but only enough so he could look me in the eye. “Like what?” he asked softly. He skimmed my hair with the fingers of his left hand. The gentle caress sent shockwaves of desire through me.
“Like you were made just for me,” I responded huskily. “In so many ways, Sawyer,” I said almost helplessly because I had no way of explaining it to him.
Sawyer’s fingers toyed with the back of my neck and ultimately settled on the small scar at the base of my neck. God, had it really only been a couple of weeks since I’d literally collided with the person who would change everything? Sawyer’s eyes moved over my face like he was trying to memorize it and then he was nodding. That small confirmation on its own would have been enough but when he captured my mouth with his, I knew there would be no going back.
Not to those days where I’d foolishly thought my pride was more important than anything else.
And not to those moments where I’d doubted the man in my arms was it for me.
My dick began to respond to Sawyer’s soul-stealing kiss, but he broke the contact before I would have been forced to do it. As badly as I wanted to lose myself in Sawyer’s body, I wanted more.
I wanted all of him.
“I have to tell you things,” Sawyer murmured against my mouth. “Promise me you’ll really listen before you say anything.”
I understood what he was asking. Though nothing he told me would change how I felt about him, he was incapable of believing that at the moment. I doubted he’d even believe it after he told me whatever he needed to tell me. Marcus had done too good of a job of stripping away Sawyer’s confidence in himself. He’d likely taken things from Sawyer that Sawyer wasn’t even aware of.
“Promise,” I agreed and sealed it with a soft brush of my mouth over his. “Do you want to lie down with me?”
Sawyer nodded. He seemed reluctant to get off my lap, which gave me hope that we’d have many more moments like it. Moments where any kind of physical distance felt wrong.
When Sawyer stood, I rolled my chair to the bed and threw back the cover. I stripped my T-shirt off but left my sweats on. I couldn’t help the sliver of embarrassment that went through me as I pulled myself out of the chair and got settled on the bed. I watched Sawyer carefully as he remained rooted in the same spot. His fingers were once again at his throat like they’d been outside. I’d thought it was just a nervous gesture at first but the more I thought about it, the more I realized that Sawyer usually went for his hair when he was nervous. I’d never seen him fiddle with the buttons on his shirt before. Hell, I’d never seen him even wear a shirt with buttons before.
