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The Queen reached the altar. Music had started to play in the background. The reverend pulled out his bible.
Don’t look at her. Don’t look at her. Don’t look at her.
Out of the corner of my eye, I saw her glance at me. Stonily, I stared ahead, not acknowledging her in the least.
And what did she do?
She smiled. Smiled at me, glowering into empty air.
Why the heck would she-?
The priest cleared his throat.
‘Dearly beloved, we are gathered together here in the sight of God, and in the face of this congregation, to join together this man and this woman in holy matrimony.’
A muscle in my jaw twitched. This man? This woman? Why in Mammon’s name couldn’t they use labels, serial numbers or at least names in that little speech? I shifted uncomfortably. Only when my feet were done shifting did I realise they had deposited me several inches closer to Miss Lillian Linton.
This man. This woman.
Stop. Stop now. Irrational. Cease this!
I shifted again.
Damnation! What was the matter with me? Did I have the fidgets?[31]
No. I didn’t. Because the fidgets only affected the legs. But now, my hand was moving, too, shifting slowly towards hers.
Stop!
I waited. It shifted again, towards that small, soft hand that was so close to mine.
Stop! That is an order.
But my hand seemed to have spent too much time in contact with Miss Lillian Linton already. It stubbornly refused to do what it was told.
But…she seemed to have the same problem. My breath caught as I noticed her small hand inch towards mine, seeming unable to resist. What was this?
‘…which is an honourable estate, instituted of God in the time of man's innocency, signifying unto us the mystical union…’
My hand moved another inch closer. By King Midas’ throne! Why couldn’t that infernal priest shut up?
‘…that is betwixt Christ and his Church…’
My hand moved another fraction of an inch closer.
Out of the corner of my eye, I caught her glancing at my face. I was sure it was cold and hard as ice. All my heat was in my fingertips, burning to move, to close the distance.
Control! Control! Ignore her!
‘…which holy estate Christ adorned and beautified with his presence, and first miracle that he wrought, in Cana of Galilee; and is commended of Saint Paul to be honourable among all men: and therefore is not by any to be enterprised, nor taken in hand, unadvisedly, lightly, or wantonly, to satisfy men's carnal lusts…’
Wild images flashed past my inner eye. Images that had no place in a chapel - and most certainly not in my mind!
Don’t move! That is an order!
But my hand jumped two whole inches forward, and I could be thankful it was only my hand. I trembled, fighting to control the rest of me.
‘…and appetites, like brute beasts that have no understanding; but reverently, discreetly, advisedly, soberly, and in the fear of God; duly considering the causes for which Matrimony was ordained. First, it was ordained for the procreation of children…’
