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Ella gazed up at me with tear-filled eyes. ‘What should I do, Lill? Aunt has her heart set on me making a good match, and yet…I can’t. I just can’t marry anybody else. I love him.’
A year or two ago I would have scoffed. I would have told her that without men, the world would be a much simpler place. Now, however…
The world would be a much simpler place without solid chocolate, too. Did that mean I wanted it to disappear to keep my butt from getting bigger?
Hell no!
Hugging my little sister to me, I murmured meaningless, comforting words.
‘What should I do?’ she repeated, gazing up at her big sister as if I had all the answers in the universe. ‘What can I do?’
What could she do? Nothing. Absolutely nothing. Against Aunt Brank’s greed and social aspirations, Ella was helpless.
What I could do, on the other hand – well, that was a totally different matter. There wasn’t a second to waste. It was time to get down to business.
The Great Reveal
‘Lill? Lill, what are you doing? You can’t just march over there and—’
‘Of course I can. The pavement is perfectly even and good to walk on. Try it.’
‘That’s not what I meant, Lill! I—’
Ignoring my dear little sister with the consummate skill of an experienced older sibling, I marched up to the door of the neighbour’s house and hammered on the door.
‘Hey, you there! Assorted strummers, jinglers and tinklers! Out with you!’
‘Lill!’
‘What?’
‘Where are your manners?’
‘I left them in my purse at home. The damn things are too heavy to carry around all the time.’
Hurried footsteps approached from the other side of the door. It opened a crack, revealing the anxious, familiar face of a certain young man.
‘Oh, it’s you.’ I smiled, pushing the door open the rest of the way. He stood there in the doorway like a lost puppy, blinking at me and Ella standing on his doorstep. ‘Good. That simplifies things. You’re in love with my little sister, aren’t you?’
‘Um,’ said Edmund, the piano-tuner’s son.
‘Bravo! How very eloquent. Just the kind of intelligent reply I was hoping to get from a future brother-in-law. Are you sure you love her? Really sure? Because if you break her heart, I’ll cut off your bollocks and…well, you don’t really want to know what I’ll do with them afterwards. Are we clear?’
‘Err,’ said Edmund.
‘Spiffing! I’m so glad we’re getting along. I can feel the beginning of a wonderful friendship here. Now, as to this whole marriage thing, I don’t have a lot of time—I have to leave on a little trip soon—so I was hoping we could get it wrapped up in a day or two? I know the two of you like to languish in lovelorn agony for months on end, but I’m afraid I haven’t got time for that anymore. I’ve got other engagements that cannot wait, so you’ll just have to postpone the lovelorn agony until after you’re married. Do you think you can manage that?’
‘Um,’ said Edmund.
‘Wonderful, wonderful. Now, I think my aunt has a dressmaker scheduled to come tomorrow morning, so this whole marriage thing will have to wait to the afternoon. Could you perhaps look in on us at, say, two pm? I’m sure we could get the whole matter wrapped up then. What do you say?’
‘Err…’ said Edmund, ‘Who are you?’
‘Dear me, right, we haven’t been officially introduced yet. Ella?’ I waved at my little sister, who stood beside me, her face for some reason covered by her hands. ‘Explain, will you?’
‘This is my sister, Lilly,’ Ella said in the tone you’d use to say, ‘This is my darling pet dog, Fluffy. He doesn’t bite, trust me, and I’m so sorry he just peed on your carpet.’
‘Oh.’ His eyes went big. ‘So this is…’
