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“I’m going to come in your mouth,” I warn.

She doesn’t stop. She sucks me harder, faster, and I realize it’s her intention to make me come in her mouth. I stop trying to hold myself back and just relax and enjoy her mouth on me, her hand on me.

I feel my stomach tightening, my cock twitching and I know I’ve reached the point of no return. My climax hits home. I feel it in every part of my body; such intense pleasure that I can feel my heart slamming in my chest as the pleasure rips through me, and with a roar, I flood her, spurting into her mouth.

She drinks my cum down almost greedily, milking me, her throat working furiously, for the last drops. Her name plays in my brain. Cindy … Cindy … Cindy.

Finally, she pulls her blonde head away and wipes the back of her hand over her mouth.

“Fucking hell, Cindy,” I whisper.

She smiles and lays down beside me, snuggling against me. I lift my arm and she moves closer. I wrap my arm around her as she snakes her arm across my waist. The weight of it on my body feels good. Surprisingly good.

I feel her cheek move against my chest as she smiles. “Fucking hell is right,” she says and laughs softly.

I lay stroking my hand up and down her back. After sex, I’m usually ready to turn over and sleep. Not with her. She traces circles on my stomach with her nails. We no longer need words. Our bodies do all of our talking for us.

Without either of us saying a word Cindy finds my mouth between her legs. She sighs with contentment as I begin to lap up her sweetness. It’s going to be hours before I get enough. Hours and hours.

Cindy

I wake up and I’m instantly aware of Alex’s strong, solid body. That’s because I’m wrapped up in his arms. Silly, but it makes me feel warm and safe and protected. As if I am a child again, without any responsibilities, financial worries or cares. Someone else will take care of my every need.

I close my eyes and luxuriate in the unfamiliar, but precious feeling. I’ve been independent and fighting my own battles for so long I finally understand how Raven, Rosa and Star feel. Why overnight their faces took a different character. My eyes snap open. But what they have and what I have is totally different. They have men who chased them like crazy and committed to them at the first opportunity, not men they had to literally seduce into bed with them.

Once again, I’ve let my guard down and let Alex back into my head. I need a moment to really think through what I’m actually doing. Very, very gently, I lift Alex’s arm up and shuffle out of bed. He makes a sound and I freeze, but he only rolls over freeing me. I slide out of bed, pick up my nightdress, and move over to the door that leads outside onto a balcony. I have a similar door in my room. After pulling my nightdress over my head, I slide the door open and step outside.

The sun is just coming up and although there’s still a slight chill in the air that brings goose bumps to my skin, it’s nice enough that I choose to stay outside.

I move over to the balcony’s railing and, resting my forearms on it, I look out over the gardens and grounds. It hits me again just how massive this place is, which although unconnected, that makes me wonder how big of a mistake I am making. I don’t even know what I’m doing here anymore.

I can play the role of the doting girlfriend while Alex and I can maintain a working relationship or we could be more. But I don’t think I can do both any longer. I can’t have hot sex with Alex and not develop any feelings for him.

My body wants more. I want more.

I know what I agreed. Half of The Macau in exchange for acting as his fiancée, but suddenly I don’t care all that much about having half the casino anymore. I don’t want our relationship to be an act. I want it to be real. And if Alex doesn’t feel the same as I do, which I don’t think he does, then I’m just setting myself up to get hurt.

Alex is so hard to read. It’s so hard to equate the man who held me so gently while I was out of my mind with fear with the man who I first met at the casino, who seemed to be a law unto himself. It’s like he’s two different people and I don’t know which one is real. And until I can work that out, I might need to keep my distance from him.

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