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“ ‘But tonight she was beautiful to him in a way that had nothing to do with the pleasant arrangement of her features or the proportions of her figure. She exuded a beauty that was deeper than her flawless complexion and rarer even than her extraordinarily blue eyes.
“ ‘She radiated a beauty that wasn’t particularly appreciated. By contemporary society’s standards, it didn’t have much value. It wasn’t sophisticated and cool, but homespun and warm. It made you feel loved and accepted despite your shortcomings, despite everything. Tonight Leslie was beautiful like you hoped your life partner would be.’ ”
When Parker stopped reading and glanced up at her, Maris managed only a slight nod and a motion for him to continue.
“Leslie asks him what had happened that day to put him in such a funk. Words to that effect.” Parker sent that page sailing over the armrest of the wheelchair and found the spot on the following page where he wanted to resume reading.
“ ‘Roark talked for ten solid minutes. The words gushed out in an uninterrupted stream, as though all day his subconscious had been choosing them and arranging them into an order that would give them the most impact and would most eloquently express the level of his despair.
“ ‘But eventually his dejection turned to outrage. He articulated the fiery internal argument he’d been having with himself, the argument that justified his anger toward Todd. “Fuck his apology!” He closed his hand into a tight fist. “He can’t undo the damage he’s done that easily.”
“ ‘When he finished venting about Todd, he cursed the pompous professor for being such an unrelenting bastard, at the same time admitting to his fear of never reestablishing a rapport with Hadley and thereby guaranteeing a dismal grade on his capstone.
“ ‘The words finally ebbed, then stopped altogether. Roark fell silent again and hunkered down into his jacket, not for the warmth it provided but from shame for sounding like such a goddamn crybaby.’ ”
Again, Parker raised his head and looked at Maris. “Well? Should I trash it or continue?”
“Continue. Please.”
“I’ll pick up with Leslie’s response.”
Returning to the manuscript, he read, “ ‘She waited until the smoke of his wrath had cleared, when it became noticeable that the cold from outside was seeping into the car. Her breath formed plumes of vapor between them. She spoke quietly, as one would to a temperamental animal who was momentarily docile. “What happened today is a good thing, Roark.”
“ ‘He snorted, looked over at her. “Good? How in God’s name is it good? Not that I believe in God.”
“ ‘He knew she wouldn’t like the atheistic remark. She was a devout believer who took offense at jokes made over anything religious. Ordinarily she admonished him for making them and asked him to kindly keep his irreverent comments to himself. This time, she elected to overlook it.
“ ‘ “The reason you’re taking this so hard is because your writing means so much to you.”
“ ‘It was a good point. He wanted to hear more. “And because it means so much to you, you’ll succeed. If you were able to shrug off the misunderstanding with Professor Hadley or laugh about it, then I would advise you to rethink your choice of career. You could dismiss this incident only if you had no passion for writing.
“ ‘ “What happened illustrates the depth of your passion. Your despondency over this… what really amounts to a hiccup in the grand scheme of things… demonstrates the level of your desire to write and write well. It hit you where it hurts most, which affirms that you’re doing what you were born to do.” She smiled. “I didn’t need it affirmed. But perhaps you did. And if you did, then this experience was worth all the anxiety it’s caused.”
“ ‘She reached for his hand and pressed it between hers. “Think about it, Roark, and you’ll realize that I’m right.” ’ ”
When Parker paused, Maris said, “She’s a very intuitive young woman.”
“You think?”
She nodded. Noticing the sheets still lying in his lap, she asked, “How does Parker respond?”
“The way most men respond to any emotionally charged situation.”
“Which is?”
“Well, depending on if we’re stimulated to feel bad or good, we either want to strike something or fuck something.”
Chapter 14
Maris cleared her throat. “I don’t suppose Roark feels like striking something.”
“Wasn’t it you who suggested that I enhance their relationship?”
“It was.”
“Okay, then. They kiss, and it gets predictably slippery. Roark opens her coat, cuddles up to her chest. She gives him access to some skin. ‘Velvety, warm, fragrant woman skin,’ it says here. I’ll work on that.” He made a notation.
“He caresses her breasts. For the first time since they began dating, he uses his mouth. He kisses her nipples, teaching her something about arousal and the pleasurable possibilities that are available to a man and woman who are willing to explore them.”
