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I spun around, needing to get the hell out of this place. I practically ran toward the front door. My feet were bare, my hair still wet, but that didn’t bother me, I still yanked the door open and slammed it behind me, causing the frame to shake. I was too angry to think, too raging to care what I looked like. I walked from one edge of the apartment building to the other, staring at the stairs every time I moved past them. It was yet another reminder of what else was going on in my life.
I hated this. I hated everything about this stupid fuckin’ place.
I halted two doors away from my apartment.
Maybe I should leave.
My breaths came easier as the thought occurred to me. Could I leave? I’d be abandoning my plans. I’d have to start over with literally nothing but the clothes on my back. It’d be hard, but it’d be worth it to get away from them.
I slapped my hand on the brickwork, wincing as the sharp edges of it dug into my palms.
No. I wouldn’t leave. I wouldn’t let them push me out. I wouldn’t let them win. I was here to change my life in spite of them. I’d yank myself out from the pits of hell even if it was only for a glimpse of sunshine.
I turned slowly, renewed energy flowing through me. I wasn’t going to be the same Luna they thought I was. I wasn’t going to be the girl who took and took without saying a word. I was done being the nice guy. I was done taking the heat. I was done—
My heart beat wildly as an engine in the otherwise quite night seeped through my ranting thoughts. I knew who it was before I set eyes on the gleaming black SUV.
He was here. But I knew it wasn’t for me. He was here for himself, just like my parents were.
* * *
MATEO
I wasn’t sure why I was here. Maybe it was because my body was working on automatic and I’d headed here after leaving the mansion. Or maybe it was because of a certain blue-eyed girl that I couldn’t get out of my head no matter how much I tried.
It had been two weeks since I’d watched her walk out of my apartment.
Fourteen days since I’d felt her skin against mine.
It was too long to go without our lips fused together, but also not long enough.
She couldn’t see me through the tinted windows, yet if felt like her eyes were burning a path through the bulletproof surface. Her body didn’t move, her muscles locking into place as she watched me.
I had the splatter of blood still on my shirt from earlier, but it wasn’t that stopping me from opening the door and going to her.
No.
It was the thought of where it would lead. If I took a leap, I was afraid I’d crash and break into a thousand pieces. I saw it when I looked into her eyes—the depth I could fall into.
I shook my head, scraping my hand down my face but not looking away from her. Physical distance separated us, but there was so much more than that. It didn’t matter that she could understand me more than anyone else—we’d been raised with addicts, something most people couldn’t identify with. It didn’t matter that when I touched her, something roared to life inside me. It didn’t matter that the kids loved her.
She wasn’t meant to be in my life. She wasn’t meant to be part of the world I’d gladly stepped in when I needed it most. I was trapped, but not like I had been at home. I wanted to be part of the criminal world. I wanted to protect the people I cared about most.
And I refused to let her be one of them.
There was a valley of space between us with no bridge to lead the way.
I knew why I’d come here. I’d come here to prove to myself that I didn’t need her. I’d come to show her that just because I could get to her, didn’t mean I couldn’t stop myself.
I licked my lips, rubbing at my chest as the finality of the situation washed over me. I’d never second-guessed a one-night stand. I’d never given it more thought as soon as they walked out the door. But Luna was different. Which was why I lifted off the brakes, pressed my foot to the accelerator, and drove away, leaving the moments we’d had behind, never to be had again.
CHAPTER 9
LUNA
I could hear the music blasting from the apartment before I’d even made it to the top of the stairs. The thumping beat caused the doors of the other apartments to shake, and I had no doubt the neighbors on either side of us were done with listening to the screaming music. I wasn’t even sure what they were listening to could even be considered music. It was more like a thousand different beats all competing with each other to see which one could be the loudest.
The door to my apartment was ajar, and I cursed at them for letting people in yet again. My rant the other night hadn’t made a bit of difference, if anything, it had made them worse. As if they wanted to prove to me that it didn’t matter what I said, they’d do whatever the hell they wanted to.
