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It was stopping her from telling him she loved him.
Once she’d washed out her conditioner, she turned the shower off and toweled herself dry, grabbing a pair of fresh pajamas from the drawer beside her bed. She looked at herself in the mirror, at her freshly scrubbed face, her red hair made darker by the dampness, and the short pajamas that barely covered her.
She had to talk to him.
That was the only way to move forward. She took a deep breath, and picked up her phone. She’d call him. That way he had an out if he needed it. But before she could press his name on the screen she heard a knock at her door.
Her hands shook as she pushed down the handle. It didn’t shock her to see him standing on the other side, wearing a pair of grey sweats and a black t-shirt that molded to his torso. But it still made her heart jump the way it always did when he was around.
“Hey.” He gave her a half smile. “I saw you outside my door earlier. I just wanted to check that you’re okay.”
She took a deep breath, willing her heart to slow down for a goddamn moment. “No, I’m not okay. Can you come in? We need to talk.”
He wasn’t sure there was a more beautiful sight in the whole world than Meghan Hart wearing shortie pajamas, with her wet hair brushed back from her gorgeous heart-shaped face. It took everything he had not to touch her. Because that’s all he could think about right now. The smell of her shampoo filled his senses, making his heart thud against his chest.
“What’s wrong?” he asked her as he stepped into her apartment, closing the door softly behind him.
She took a deep breath. “I don’t know.” Her hands were still shaking. She looked down at them, frowning. “I guess I’m afraid.”
“What of? Has someone hurt you?” He blinked. “Is it Carlyn? Has she contacted you?” His hands curled into fists.
She shook her head. “It’s not Carlyn. It’s me. I’m afraid of me.”
“Why are you afraid of yourself?”
“Because I’m in love with you, and I’m scared I’m going to end up getting hurt.”
The knife that had been lodged in his heart for the past few months loosened itself, and for the first time in forever it felt easy to breathe.
She loved him. It felt like the biggest prize he’d ever been given. He couldn’t stop himself from smiling.
“You have no idea how much I needed to hear that. I love you, too, sweetheart.” He reached out to cup her face. Her skin felt warm and d
amp. “And you don’t need to explain to me about being afraid. I get it. More than anybody else in the world. But I’m never going to hurt you again. I couldn’t stand it. I want to protect you, not hurt you. Love you, not scare you.” He inhaled softly. “You’re it for me. I wake up at crazy hours, and it’s always you I see there. You’re it for me, Meghan. And you don’t know how goddamned good it feels to know you feel the same.”
He lifted his other hand, cradling her face in his palms, dropping his head until his brow was touching hers. He could feel the warm breath escaping from her trembling lips, and the flutter of her eyelashes against his skin.
“So you want me?” she whispered.
“Want is such a weak word to describe how I feel about you. And need is wrong, too. When I look at my future, I see you and Isla in it. Center stage. The two of you goofing around in my kitchen, or laughing at me when I bomb into the swimming pool. I want to be the reason you smile, the person who’s always by your side. I want to be part of you, the way you’re already part of me.”
She inhaled a ragged breath. “You already are. You have been for a while.”
“That’s all I need to hear.” He smiled softly at her. “So now the rest is just details. When we decide to move in together. When we get married.” He winked to let her know he was joking. “When we tell Isla, which I guess we should do before any of those things.”
She laughed. “I guess we should. And I want to tell her soon.”
His eyes flashed. “So do I.” Because he wasn’t sure he could hold back from touching her every time they passed in the hallway or rode up the elevator. Now that he knew she felt the same way he did, he never wanted to let her go. “Is Isla here?”
She shook her head. “No, she’s at my parents house until tomorrow.” There was a half-smile on her face that he wanted to kiss away. “We’re all alone right now.”
“We are?” He tucked a stray lock of wet hair behind her ear. She shivered at his touch, and damn if that didn’t make him want her more. “That’s interesting.”
She tipped her head to the side. “It is?”
“Yeah.” He closed his eyes and breathed her in. “I’m so glad I knocked on your door. And that you almost knocked on mine.”
Meghan bit down a smile. “This time I was the one who was scared. And you were the one who was brave.”
