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My body vibrates with the swell of emotions, and my throat tightens until it’s hard to breathe. I’ve never heard Dash speak like this. His words aren’t as unnerving as his somber tone. He’s so uncomfortable, it’s as if I can feel the emotions on the air.
Lifting his gaze, his mouth remains in a thin, hard line, and his eyes are a mix of anger and sadness.
I reach for him, placing my hand to his cheek and running my thumb through the coarse hair of his beard. For a moment, he relaxes, placing his hand over mine. “I don’t want to hide my past from you.”
“You’re a good man, Dash.” The way he treats Holden proves it.
“No. I haven’t always been.” He twists away from me, facing the yard again. “The last time Brandy came back was three years ago. She had a fight with her boyfriend, called me crying, and convinced me to meet her. I did, and I also let things go too far. I could blame it on one too many drinks or claim I got caught up in the moment. I still had this fantasy that it would fix everything, but instead, my decision ruined everything. I was engaged to Janelle. I told her what happened, and eventually she forgave me.”
“But you couldn’t forgive yourself,” I infer. “So you left town and couldn’t bring yourself to stay in one place for fear you’d hurt someone again.”
Dash pinches his lips between his teeth. He moves his hand closer to mine but stops short as if he’s afraid to touch me. “If this changes your mind about anything—about us—I understand.”
“What’d you tell her today?” The question is out of my mouth before my brain processes the words, but I need to know.
“That I’m happy, and I’m not willing to put that on the line again for something that has only caused pain.”
I nudge him in the shoulder with mine, and an awkward laugh escapes my mouth. “I’m not exactly used to being in a relationship with someone who can own their fuckups. I trust your word, Dash.”
Did I really say that?
He leans toward me and presses a kiss to my temple. A long exhale escapes my mouth, and all of my muscles relax. I’m about to fall into him when Holden trudges up the steps, and collapses on the swing nearby, letting out an audible sigh.
“Did Timber wear you out?”
“Can we get ice cream?” He looks up at me with a pleading, expectant grin.
Dash and I both laugh.
“How about dinner first?” Dash asks.
“Waffles and pizza?”
“Waffles and pizza?” I repeat his words, and the thought makes my head hurt. “Like mixed together or—”
“Yeah,” Holden nods.
I look over my shoulder at Dash who looks like he’s thinking the same thing as me. “What’s your second choice?”
“Pasketti.”
“Okay, spaghetti sounds reasonable.” I lean my shoulder backward, into Dash’s chest. “Would you like to join us for spaghetti?”
“As a matter of fact”—he wraps his arms around my middle, and I can feel his hot breath on my neck—”I would love that.”
While Holden packs up his things, Dash and I steal a moment away in the kitchen.
We stare at each other for a moment, neither of us sure what to say.
Then he takes a step, closing the space between us and placing his hands on either side of my face. He presses his forehead to mine and closes his eyes, his breath warm on my lips. “The last thing I ever want to do is hurt you or Holden.”
“I know. I also know I’ve been skeptical and guarded, but you never pushed me more than I could handle. You let me get to know you at my own pace.” I lean up on my tiptoes, and he lowers his mouth to mine.
His lips brush against mine so gently, I barely feel them, but the way his eyes caress mine is undeniable. His smile is relaxed, like everything he’s been holding onto for three years has finally been released.
The back of his hand brushes my cheek, and the smile on his face grows. “I knew you were a force to be reckoned with the moment I met you. Both you and your son have certainly lived up to that.”
