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SAGE
Hiding out for six months was bad. The two weeks since being back were even worse.
I was still getting used to my new nightmare of a life. I barely left my room when Alex was gone, which was often. He worked almost every day and spent a lot of time with his parents or the society. It had been much harder than I expected to get him to open up about their secrets. He was so tight-lipped about everything. The trust wasn’t there yet, and I was worried it never would be.
My plan seemed farfetched now. Every night when he came home, we spent time together. I forced myself to act how I used to before everything happened. It was more difficult than I could have imagined. He seemed to want things to be how they used to be. He was sweet and loving toward me but guarded at the same time. A new habit of downing a couple of glasses of wine before he came home helped. It took the edge off and made me more agreeable.
Niko was here all the time, and I was never alone in the house. Other than asking to go to the store and to see my dad, I hadn’t spoken more than two things to him since the night Geo was here. The words they had said to me played in a loop in my head. I knew they were trying to scare me into staying. And that night, it worked. But now I was more petrified about this being my forever life. I couldn’t do it.
I groaned as I lay on the bed and stared at the ceiling. As much as I hated being around Niko, I couldn’t stay in this room anymore. I was going crazy. There was only so much TV someone could watch without going insane. Even working out didn’t help. He was the only person to talk to. And maybe I could get him to open up more than Alex about the society. It was worth a try.
Walking into the living room, I sat on the opposite end of the couch from Niko. I rolled my eyes when he did a double take. Avoiding him like the plague had been my plan for the past two weeks. He quickly covered his surprise and flashed a grin.
“Finally got bored with the room?”
“If you’re going to be here, then I might as well get used to it.”
“Wow, what a way to make a guy feel special.”
“Are we going to talk about our last conversation with Geo? You know, when you told me your cult owns me? Or are you planning to ignore it and be your usual sarcastic, dickish self?” He turned his attention fully on me. I hadn’t been planning on talking about it, but after stewing about it for two weeks, I couldn’t hold it back anymore.
His eyes went cold. “How do you want me to act, Sage? Do you want me to treat you like the prisoner you are? Or do you want the pretense of having a semi-normal life of living with your boyfriend and his dickish brother?”
Shock coursed through me. I didn’t know what kind of answer I was expecting, but it wasn’t that.
“Which is the real you?” I whispered, regretting it the second the words were out. I was used to the arrogant jerk I’d known nearly my whole life from living in the same small town. I feared the cold monster I’d seen him turn into. What terrified me more was the face I’d seen in Kalamazoo. The one that pulled me from my panic and grounded me. Because it was a side of him I didn’t completely loathe.
His eyebrows raised in surprise, but he stayed silent. We stared at each other for a tense minute before I faced the TV again. Apparently, he wasn’t done with the conversation because he asked another question.
“So, how’s your plan going?”
“Plan? I told you, this was my plan. To stay with Alex.”
“That’s why you need to drink every night before he comes home?”
I shot him an irritated glance. He watched everything I did. Nothing went unnoticed in this house.
“It’s been a long year,” I mumbled, folding my arms around my legs.
He nodded and seemed to wait to see if I wanted to keep talking. The whole plan was to get him to talk, but my mind was blank. He was on edge. I doubted he’d share anything useful with me. We sat in silence for a few minutes until I broke it.
“How come you don’t ever go to those meetings with Alex?”
“Someone has to be here.”
“I know that,” I snapped. Of course I knew I had to be watched. “Why does he always go instead of you?”
He narrowed his eyes. “Why so curious all of a sudden?”
“I told you, might as well get used to you being here. I’m tired of not talking to anyone all day,” I said. And unlike with Alex, I didn’t have to act around Niko. I could say and do whatever I wanted.
“What did I say the night you got here? Talk about the group is off limits. I’m doing my part by being here and babysitting you.”
My fists clenched as I jumped off the couch. “I’m not a kid. It’s been weeks, and I haven’t tried once to run.”
“I haven’t given you a chance to try to run, Sage.”
“I could have if I wanted to.” I held my ground, refusing to feel intimidated by him as he stood up and towered over me.
He chuckled. “Really? How? Because the only time I leave this house is when Alex is here. You don’t have car keys. You have nowhere to go.”
I was regretting coming to talk to him. He always found a way to get under my skin. To control the conversation. I could play that game too.
“You came and warned me all those months ago. You knew I was in that motel but didn’t say a word. Warned me to clear my laptop. If I wanted to leave, why wouldn’t you help me now?”
His body tensed, and his face turned stone cold.
“If you want to go, then go.”
I gaped at him, knowing there was more to it.
