Page 94 of The Birthday List (Maysen Jar 1)

How could I have been so stupid? Why hadn’t I tried these on before we’d left Bozeman? I grew up in Alaska—hiking in Alaska. I’d learned young how important it was to have good hiking boots.

I wanted to scream. I wanted to cry. I wanted to throw something. I was close to the end. So fuckin

g close, but all I wanted to do was turn around.

I took another step and a fresh stab of pain shot through my foot, causing me to falter and my ankle to twist. “Ahh!” I let out a strangled cry as I dropped to my hands and knees. Bits of gravel dug into my palms as I closed my eyes and took a breath.

I had to keep going. I had to finish this hike.

I whimpered as I tried to stand, struggling to find my balance on two aching feet. I would have dropped again if not for the two large hands that came under my arms and helped me up.

“What’s wrong?” Cole’s face searched mine. “Are you hurt? Did you twist your ankle?”

I looked to my traitorous feet. “No, I’m okay.”

“Bullshit,” he clipped. “What’s wrong?”

He was wearing a hat today, an old Montana State baseball cap, but it didn’t hide the worry pinching his green eyes.

It was his concern for me that broke the thin hold I’d kept on my emotions. Frustrated tears welled and my chin quivered as I looked back at my boots. “My boots are too tight. My feet must have grown. These were my hiking boots from high school and college, and I . . . I didn’t know.”

“Hey.” Cole tipped up my chin. “It’s okay. We’ll just go back down.”

“No!” I shook my head frantically. “We’re so close. I need to do this. I can do this.” I tried to take a step past him but his hands clamped on my biceps and didn’t let me pass.

“Stop,” Cole whispered. “You’ve hiked Glacier. Maybe not to the lake, but you did it. You can mark this off the list, even if we turn back now.”

“No, I need to do this.” My voice cracked in despair. “Not just for Jamie’s list, but for me. I need to finish this hike.”

Every agonizing step up this mountain had become so much more than just marking a box on Jamie’s list. This was a chance to prove to myself that I had the strength Cole saw in me. To prove I could overcome any pain.

That no matter what life threw at me, this was my chance to prove I could handle it all. Blistered feet, shattered heart—I could survive it all and keep marching on.

“I can do this.” I held my breath, ready for the inevitable pain as I stepped past Cole. He let me go this time but I felt his eyes on my back as I took one step, then another. My hopes soared when the pain didn’t bring me down.

I’d almost convinced myself I could make it this last stretch when I took another step and my foot slipped again, forcing me back to my hands and knees. “Damn it!” I cried. “I’m so close.”

Cole’s hand came to my back as he knelt by my side. “Let me help.” Gently, he positioned me so I was sitting on the narrow trail for an overdue break.

“I just need a minute, then I’ll be okay.” I sniffled and wiped away a fresh batch of tears.

He sighed, but instead of taking a seat next to me, he knelt by my outstretched feet as he started untying the laces on my boots.

“What are you doing?”

“Assessing the damage.” With a tender touch, he tugged off my boots.

Even though he’d taken care, I winced as they pulled free. Just as I’d suspected, my socks were spotted with blood. My heels were the worst, nearly the entire area covered in red, with my toes a close runner-up.

“Fuck, Poppy.” Cole shook his head. “Those boots are not going back on.”

“But—”

He held up a finger, cutting me off. “I want to take these socks off too, but it’s going to hurt.”

“Okay.” I sucked in a huge breath and held it as Cole’s fingers stretched my socks wide, peeling them away from my raw skin. The cotton stuck in a few places, and as it pulled free, a pained cry escaped my lips. Blood rushed to both feet, causing them to swell immediately.

My feet were wrecked. There was no way I’d be able hike up any farther and I had no idea how we’d get back down. The soles of my feet were surprisingly unscathed. Maybe I could pull back on my socks and just go down in them. Because at this point, anything was better than the boots.