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“You’re not fucked up, Theo,” I interjected.
“You know what I mean, though,” he said. “Roman, I’ve never fallen for someone like I’ve been falling for you.”
I still couldn’t believe the words he was saying.
Falling for you.
Could that really be true? Could it be true, that Theo would want something real with me? Something more than a hot hookup?
Secretly, deep inside, I had been preparing for the moment that Theo would fade out of my life. The moment he wouldn’t need me anymore, for protection or companionship or hookups. The moment I’d be left behind. I’d relied on only myself for so long that it was my default. I couldn’t even imagine a world where I didn’t have to just rely on myself.
A world where somebody else might want to be with me as much as I wanted to be with them.
And I realized, in one concentrated moment, that there was no way I was ever going to be totally in control. Not if I wanted to take a risk on something great. Not if I wanted to let a beautiful, crazy, electric spark of a person like Theo into my life.
I had to let go.
I had to trust.
Even if it felt like strapping in for a ride that could take me anywhere.
“So let me sleep over, then, Theo,” I said, swallowing hard before turning to face him. “Let me sleep next to you. And let me kiss you before bed. Let me kiss you when you wake up. Let me hold you, and fuck you, and make you realize that you are extraordinary, and it has absolutely nothing to do with how famous you are.”
His eyes were wide like saucers, beautiful and open. “Roman…”
“And if I get hurt, I get hurt,” I said, reaching over to squeeze his hand in mine. “If it means I have to let go of control, hell, even if it fucks up everything for me someday, it’ll be worth it. If you’re willing to go all in, I’m willing to go all in, too. I just… Theo, I never thought you could want that with me. Not in a million years. I couldn’t let myself hope.”
He let out a breath, shaking his head. “You don’t even have to hope. It’s real, Roman. There’s nothing I’ve ever wanted more.”
In an instant, he sprang toward me, straddling me on the driver’s side, a feeling that had begun to rank among my favorite feelings in the world. I gripped his hand and his side, pulling him in close to me, the heat of his body pressing up against mine. I tilted my head back and watched his eyes as he leaned in, hesitating just for a moment to watch me.
“You make me so fucking happy, Roman,” he whispered, licking his lips before he leaned in, crushing his mouth to mine.
I let out a sigh, pulling him even tighter as I kissed him deeply.
It had never felt so good to give up control. I could taste the tequila-lime on his tongue, and his hair smelled like him—a scent that somehow, already, felt like somewhere I belonged. All the blood in my body was rushing straight to my cock, and for the first time with Theo, I didn’t feel a shred of hesitation or guilt about it.
“I hated being in bed without you,” Theo said as I pressed kisses along the side of his neck, tucking my nose into his soft locks of hair.
“I hated finding out that you weren’t able to sleep,” I murmured. “You’re going to sleep in my arms tonight.”
“God, please,” he whispered, arching his head back as I kissed his collarbone. My dick was throbbing beneath my jeans now.
“If we don’t go now, I doubt we’ll even make it home,” I said.
“True,” he said. “I love Red’s Tavern, but I don’t think I want to get caught fucking right here in the parking lot.”
“I would fuck you absolutely anywhere in the world,” I said, nibbling at the top of his shoulder. “But let’s go now, before you make me come right here in my pants.”
As I drove home, I figured out very quickly just how fun Theo could be when there was nothing holding us back. He settled back into the passenger side, but as I drove through the looping country roads back to his house, his hand wandered over to massage my thigh before making its way up to my cock.
“Fuck,” I whispered as he massaged his palm over my erection, sliding over it through the fabric of my jeans. Right as I thought it was going to be so much I’d have to pull over, Theo relented, going back to running his hand along my thigh.
The moment I pulled my truck back into his garage, I hopped out of the driver’s side and made my way over to the other side. After he got out I pushed his back up against the passenger side door, kissing him.
