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Cash stopped walking. He turned to me and put his hands on my shoulders. “Serafima. I want to marry you and I want you to have my last name because I love you. I love you with everything inside of me and I almost from the second I met you. There is no one that would ever be better for me than you and there never will be.”
I just stared at him, confused, my heart starting to race. “What? That’s not true.”
“It is one-hundred-percent true. I love you.” He tapped his chest. “You’re in here and you’re not going anywhere. That’s why I want, no, I need to be your true partner. I can live with you not loving me the way I love with you. But I need to know that you at least care enough to want a relationship built on friendship and trust and respect.”
Now I was crying. Words were trapped in my throat. It felt like I wasn’t entitled to have Cash love me, because the love from a man like him was for life. It was deep and honest and true and forever.
“You’ve got to meet me halfway,” he said, urgently. “That’s all I’m asking. If you can’t do that, then I promise I will take care of you and the baby. I’ll pay off your house or buy you a new one, pay off the bakery debt, support the baby and Ava, Johnny, and Marigold, and we can co-parent and give our child and your kids a happy life.”
My lip started to tremble. I was going to lose him and it was all my fault. Everything about what he said was a great future but it was an empty one if I couldn’t open my mouth and be vulnerable and open and honest. Yet I still could only manage to say, “Is that what you want?” It was nothing but a whisper.
“No. Of course not. That’s not what I want at all. Not one fucking bit. I want to be the man that you love. The man who makes all of your dreams come true. The man who gives you everything that you deserve, who has the privilege of loving you every day. The man who is standing in the kitchen and looks over at you and your eyes go soft and you smile because…”
My shoulders dropped, my eyes widened, my mouth softened into a smile. I was going to get everything and I was the luckiest woman alive.
Cash’s hands went up into his hair and he swore under his breath. “Jesus, like you’re doing now. Your eyes right now. Serafima. What are you doing?”
Grabbing hold of my future with both hands. That’s what I was doing.
“You are that man, Cash. You are one hundred percent that man. And I’m looking at you and my eyes are going soft and I’m smiling because I love you. I love you so much, with everything inside of me. I fell in love with you in Mexico during that massage because you made me feel like I was so special, so cared for, so… beautiful. I love you. And I don’t want to lose you. Ever.”
“You won’t. Ever. You have all of me.” He pulled me into his chest and he took my hands. “You might want to close your eyes for this.”
That made me laugh softly. “You’d better be planning to kiss me.”
“Oh, I am. But close your eyes.”
I did, waiting to feel him take my lips with his. Instead I sensed his movement. My eyes popped open. Cash was on the grass, on one knee. He took my hand in his.
He looked up at me, earnest. “You know what comes next. I’m not sure this is much better than the first two times I mentioned marriage, but I promise if you say yes, I’ll make it up to you with the biggest diamond you've ever seen.”
My heart swelled. “I don’t need the biggest diamond I’ve ever seen. I just need you as my partner, as my best friend, as my person.”
“Serafima, will you marry me?”
“Yes.” Tears flooded my eyes. No fear this time. Just love and joy. “I most certainly will, Cash Young.”
He grinned and got off the grass and scooped me up into a hug. We kissed each other with soft touches and it felt like a relief, a kiss to erase all doubts, all insecurities, all fear.
“Why didn’t you ever tell me you love me?” I asked him.
“I didn’t want to scare you and have you bolt. Why didn’t you tell me you love me?”
“I didn’t want to pressure you.”
“We’re so damn considerate we almost screwed this whole thing up. It’s a great thing that we both want to take care of the other person, that we’re taking each other’s feelings into consideration. But maybe instead of assuming we know what the other one is feeling, we should just share what we’re feeling from now on.”
“That sounds like a really smart idea.” I smiled at him. “We’re smart people. We can figure this out. After all, you knew exactly how to approach me in Mexico.”
“I did, didn’t I?” he murmured. “Tonight, when you come to bed in sweatpants, I’m just going to ease them off of you and use my tongue on you until you come apart.”
I shivered. “See? You do know me.”
“Hey, uh, sorry to interrupt,” Faith called out from the kitchen. “But Cash, can I borrow your car?”
Johnny’s head appeared next to Faith’s. “Mom, where are the pizza rolls?”
Marigold came running out into the yard.
Toni yelled, “Marigold, no! Get back here.”
“I want to go with Mama.”
We looked at each and laughed. “We’re lucky we got five minutes,” I said.
“Damn lucky.” Cash pushed my hair back and gave me a look that made my toes curl. “Damn lucky in every single way.”
