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Chapter 7
Things looked different in the morning. I knew I was punishing Natalie by always bringing up the past. Yes, she deserved to take responsibility, but when was enough, enough?
I didn’t know. But I wanted to change. I didn’t like this feeling I had toward her. I didn’t want to focus on it so much. I didn’t want it to keep taking over my life. I just wanted to move on.
We had a mostly silent breakfast, and I was dreading the hours in the truck. I was so fucking sick of driving.
My body was over it too.
At least the weather was going to be good today. Mostly sunny skies and temps that weren’t too hot. As we started traveling farther north, we’d escape the hottest temperatures. Arizona felt like it happened years go. I was happy to leave the heat behind in exchange for ocean breezes.
Natalie picked another podcast, about moral panics in the United States. Not exactly light, but it was interesting. I’d learned so much on this trip.
Just before we were going to stop for lunch, I saw a sign for a lake and I took the exit.
“Where are we going?” Natalie asked.
I didn’t answer her and just kept following the signs for the lake.
It was my turn to plan a detour.
There was a massive parking lot for the lake, a campground, a restaurant, hiking trails, and a mini golf park.
“Come on,” I said, getting out of the truck.
Natalie followed me as I crossed the lot and made my way toward the sand that was covered with towels and blankets and people and umbrellas and coolers.
Neither of us had bathing suits, but it didn’t matter. I just kept walking until I was at the edge of the water and shucked off my shoes. Hopefully no one would steal them.
I walked into the water, not waiting for Natalie to follow.
“Emerald, what are you doing?” Natalie almost never used my full name. When we were kids, she’d said it sounded like it belonged to a princess. I liked that, having a princess name.
I turned around when I was waist-deep in the water.
“Come on,” I said. “Get in.”
She stood there, her arms crossed for a minute.
“Come on, Nat,” I said.
She rolled her eyes, but took off her shoes and waded in after me.
I kept walking backwards and she followed me.
“What are you doing?” she asked me again.
“Swimming. What does it look like?” I turned onto my back. The water in the lake was so much warmer than ocean water, but you didn’t float as easily.
“We could have at least brought towels or something. I have some in a box in the truck.”
I mean, that was a good point. I hadn’t really thought about that part.
I’d only thought as far as getting in the water. Getting out hadn’t been a consideration.
“Too late now,” I said, flipping back over and paddling a little bit.
She shook her head and swam with me.
