Page 12 of How Much I Want


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She shrugs. “When a girl hears a guy is toxic, it makes sense to try to get to the bottom of what that means before she decides whether she wants to spend more time with him.”

“Yeah, I suppose it does,” I say with a sigh. “I promise not to be toxic with you.”

“Have you promised other women that?”

“I’ve never promised anyone anything, which is how I got the toxic title. From the outside, I must look like an asshole, but I never make promises I can’t keep. So, usually, I make no promises.”

“But you’re promising not to be toxic with me.”

“You noticed that, huh?” I place the train station on the carpet so I can install the tower piece that goes on top.

“I’ve noticed a lot of things where you’re concerned.”

“Like what?”

“You’re very handsome, for one thing.”

“Am I?”

She rolls her eyes. “As if you haven’t heard that your whole damned life.”

I laugh harder than I have in a long time. It’s been a rough year with my mom’s illness and getting a new business off the ground. Sofia has been a bright spot, and she’s getting brighter by the second. “I might’ve heard that a few times.”

“Whatever. It’s the cause of all your problems.”

“I didn’t know I had problems.”

“With women. You attract them too easily and discard them just as easily.”

“Ouch. That hurts.”

“Truth hurts.”

“Can I tell you the truth?”

“I wish you would.”

I put down the screwdriver and look at her—really look at her. “I like you. I want to spend time with you and Mateo. I want to be a better man for you so you can have everything you want and deserve. But the thing is… I’ve never really done this before.”

“Done what?”

“I think it’s called a relationship?”

She loses it laughing. She laughs so hard, tears fill her eyes.

“You think that’s funny, huh?”

Nodding, she wipes away tears. “Hysterical.”

I shake my head in pretend despair. “I’m baring my soul to you, and all you do is laugh at me.”

“Is that what you’re doing? Baring your soul?”

“This is as bare as my soul gets. I don’t have these conversations with women. Well, usually I don’t.”

“Right, because you’re too busy taking whatever they’ll give before you move on to the next one.”

I wince at how close to the mark she strikes with that comment.

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