Page 2 of How Much I Want


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Nico comes to find me in Marlene’s dining room, where the huge table is covered with serving dishes and other party items.

“Gracias,” I say to him. “Lo siento.” When I’m upset, I revert to my native language.

“Don’t thank me or apologize to me,” he says in a harsh tone that’s not directed at me.

How do I know that? I couldn’t say other than he’s never been anything other than sweet to me, but Joaquín can make the sweetest person angry in a matter of seconds. I never saw that side of him until after we were married.

“I don’t like the way that guy acts as if you still belong to him.”

“He knows I don’t.”

Nico puts his hands on his hips, frustration apparent in his pose and expression. “Does he?”

“If he doesn’t, that’s not my fault. What else can I do besides file for divorce?”

“I hate the idea of you guys not being safe,” he says, softly so as not to alarm Mateo.

“We’re safe.” The waver in my voice tells the true story. I never feel truly safe except for when I’m at work, surrounded by people like him who care about me. And Nico doesn’t even work at Giordino’s. He’s just there a lot, especially when I’m working.

“I wish…” He stops himself and shakes his head.

“What do you wish?”

“We should talk about that sometime when we’re not surrounded by people during a holiday.”

My heart is beating so fast I wonder if I’m going to pass out, or something equally embarrassing, in front of the man who’s become a close friend over the last few months. What does he want to talk about?

“I’m going to contact a friend who’s a cop and ask him to send cars by here later, just in case your ex decides to come back and start trouble.”

I swallow hard at the thought of my ex-husband causing trouble for the family that’s been so good to us. “You really think that’s necessary?”

“I do.”

“Maybe Mateo and I should go. If we’re not here, then no one will bother your family.”

“You’re safer here than you’d be anywhere else. The people here would kill for you.”

“Would they?”

“They would.”

“All of them, or just you?”

“All of them, but especially me.”

“And why is that?”

“That’s the thing we should maybe talk about when my entire family isn’t about to arrive for Nochebuena.”

The look he gives me when he says those words steals the breath from my lungs. Nico Giordino is the sexiest man on the planet, and I’ll fight anyone who says otherwise. Right in that moment, I don’t care that his sisters and cousin think he’s toxic toward women.

I just want more of him and the way he makes me feel.

NICO

Nochebuena is usually my favorite night of the year, but I can’t relax after the encounter with Sofia’s ex. Not to mention work is busy, and I’m keeping an eye on things while my family parties all around me. My phone buzzes with constant questions that only I can answer as the owner of the car service that’s running at full tilt tonight. Normally, I’d be thrilled about that, but I can’t think about anything other than Sofia, Mateo and the son of a bitch who is her child’s father.

I got to see him in action earlier when he dropped Mateo at Abuela’s for the party. After he hassled Sofia—and me when I got involved—I asked my friend Miguel, who’s a cop, to send patrols past the house in case he comes back looking for trouble. Miguel filled me in on Joaquín’s background, which put me even more on edge.

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