Page 25 of How Much I Want


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“I wasn’t trying to make you jealous by talking to him.”

“I know. I’m just being ridiculous, and you should know I’ve never been jealous over a woman in my life. I probably didn’t handle that as well as I could have.”

“Do you think?”

His grunt of laughter fills me with relief that whatever that was, it’s over now, and it happened without an ugly argument, raised voices or the dreaded backhand. It’s going to take me time to get used to being with someone who doesn’t behave that way.

“Could I tell you something else?” I ask him.

“Anything you want.”

“I appreciate that we talked about it and got through it without an ugly incident.”

He reaches over and takes my hand. “No ugly incidents with me. I promise.”

“That’s another promise that might be hard to keep.”

He raises my hand to his lips and sends shivers down my spine with the tender kiss he places on my hand. “That’ll be the easiest promise I’ll ever keep. I will never, ever be ugly or violent with you or your son. I swear to God and on the lives of everyone I love that you can count on that promise.”

“You can’t imagine what that means to me.”

“I want to kill him for hurting you.”

“Don’t do that, okay?”

“I won’t as long as you know I want to.” He continues to kiss my hand and the inside of my wrist and has every pleasure point in my body humming with awareness of him in a matter of seconds.

“I wanna ride my bike!”

Nico smiles as he glances in the rearview mirror. “Almost there, buddy. A few more minutes.”

“In case I forget to tell you later, this is the nicest Christmas I’ve ever had.”

NICO

I’m falling so hard for both of them, it’s not even funny. When she said this was the nicest Christmas she’d ever had before we’d even done anything… My heart felt like it was being squeezed inside the tightest vise, and I could barely breathe. After moving all the cars out, I’ve been chasing Mateo around in the driveway for at least an hour while Sofia sits on the front steps, clapping and cheering him on.

Watching Mateo laugh and smile and work his tiny legs on the pedals has been the most fun I’ve had in a long time. After the ordeal he’s been through, to see him playing like a healthy child is super rewarding, and I can tell it’s making his mom happy, too.

“You want to take a break and get a snack?” I ask him.

When he nods, I pluck him off the bike and plop him onto my shoulders. “Let’s go see what Mrs. Elena has cooked up.”

“Mama!”

“I’m coming.”

I lead the way into the house through the garage. My mother is bustling around the kitchen, barking out orders to my sisters, Maria and Dee, like a drill sergeant.

“My buddy Mateo is getting hungry, Mom. How much longer until dinner?”

“Thirty minutes.”

“Can I do anything to help?” Sofia asks.

Mom smiles at her. “Absolutely not. You’re our guest. You should relax and enjoy.”

“Technically, I’m a guest, too,” Maria says. “Since I don’t live here anymore.”

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