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I says, "Yup," an the President say, "Well what did you want to do a thing like that for?"
An I says, "Cause he was drownin," an the President say, "You should have held him under, instead of saving him. Anyway, it's history now, because the son of a bitch died while you were away in the jungle."
"You got a tv set?" I axed.
The President look at me kind of funny. "Yeah, I have one, but I don't watch it much these days. Too much bad news."
"You ever watch 'The Beverly Hillbillies'?" I say.
"It's not on yet," he say.
"What is?" I axed.
" 'To Tell the Truth' - but you don't want to look at that - it's a bunch of shit." Then he say, "Look here, I have a meeting to go to, why don't I walk you to the door?" When we get outside on the porch, an the President say in a very low voice, "Listen, you want to buy a watch?"
I say, "Huh?" an he step over close to me an shove up the sleeve on his suit an lo an behole he must of had twenty or thirty wristwatches aroun his arm.
"I ain't got no money," I says.
The President, he roll down his sleeve an pat me on the back. "Well, you come back when you do and we'll work something out, okay?"
He shook my han an a bunch of photographers come up an start takin our picher an then I'm gone. But I'll say this, that President seem like a nice feller after all.
Anyhow, I'm wonderin what they gonna do with me now, but I don't have to wonder long.
It took bout a day or so for things to quiet down, an they had put me up in a hotel, but then a couple of fellers come in one afternoon an say, "Listen here, Gump, the free ride's over. The government ain't payin for none of this anymore - you're on your own now."
"Well, okay," I say, "but how bout givin me a little travelin money to get home on. I'm kinda light right now."
"Forget it, Gump," they say. "You is lucky not to be in jail for conkin the Clerk of the Senate on the head with that medal. We done you a favor to get you off that rap - but we is washin our hans of your ass as of right now."
So I had to leave the hotel. Since I ain't got no things to pack, it wadn't hard, an I just went out on the street. I walked a wile, down past the White House where the President live, an to my suprise they is a whole bunch of people out front got on rubber masks of the President's face an they is carryin some kind of signs. I figger he must be pleased to be so popular with everbody.
Chapter Seventeen
Even tho they said they wouldn't give me no money, one of the fellers did loan me a dollar before I lef the hotel. First chance I got, I phoned home to the po house where my mama was stayin to let her know I'm okay. But one of them nuns says, "We ain't got no Mrs. Gump here no longer."
When I axed where she was, the nun say, "Dunno - she done run off with some protestant." I thanked her an hanged up the phone. In a way, I'm sort of relieved. At least mama done run off with somebody, an ain't in the po house no more. I figger I got to find her, but to tell the truth, I ain't in no big hurry, cause sure as it's gonna rain, she'll be bawlin an hollerin an fussin at me on account of I lef home.
It did rain. Rained cats an dogs an I foun me a awnin to stand under till some guy come out an run me off. I was soakin wet an cold an walkin past some government buildin in Washington when I seen a big ole plastic garbage bag settin in the middle of the sidewalk. Just as I get close to it, the bag commenced to move a little bit, like there is somethin in there!
I stopped an went up to the bag an nudged it a little with my toe. Suddenly the bag jump bout four feet back an a voice come out from under it, say, "Git the fuck away from me!"
"Who is that in there?" I axed, an the voice say back, "This is my grate - you go find your own."
"What you talkin bout?" I say.
"My grate," the voice say. "Git off my grate!"
"What grate?" I axed.
All of a sudden the bag lift up a little an a feller's head peek out, squintin up at me like I'm some kinda idiot.
"You new in town or somethin?" the feller says.
"Sort of," I answered. "I'm jus tryin to get outta the rain."
The feller under the bag is pretty sorry-lookin, half bald-headed, ain't shaved in months, eyes all red an bloodshot an most of his teeth gone.
"Well," he say, "in that case I reckon it okay for a little wile - here." He reach up an han me another garbage bag, all folded up.
"What I'm sposed to do with this?" I axed.
"Open it up an git under it, you damn fool - you said you wanted to git outta the rain." An then he pull his bag back down over hissef.
Well, I did what he said, an to tell you the truth, it wadn't so bad, really. They was some hot air comin up outta the grate an it make the bag all warm an cozy inside an kep off the rain. We be squattin side-by-side on the grate with the bags over us an after a wile the feller says over to me, "What's your name anyway?"
"Forrest," I says.
"Yeah? I knew a guy named Forrest once. Longtime ago."
"What's your name?" I axed.
"Dan," he say.
"Dan? Dan?-hey, wait a minute," I says. I thowed off my garbage bag an went an lifted up the bag off the feller an it was him! Ain't got no legs, an he is settin on a little wood cart with roller-skate wheels on the bottom. Must of aged twenty years, an I could hardly recognize him. But it was him. It was ole Lieutenant Dan!
After he had got out of the Army hospital, Dan went back to Connecticut to try to get back his ole job teachin history. But they wadn't no history job available, so they made him teach math. He hated math, an besides, the math class was on the secont floor of the school an he had a hell of a time makin it up the stairs with no legs an all. Also, his wife done run off with a tv producer that lived in New Yawk an she sued him for divorce on grounds of "incompatibility."
He took to drinkin an lost his job an jus didn't do nothin for a wile. Thieves robbed his house of everthin he had an the artificial legs they had give him at the VA hospital were the wrong size. After a few years, he said, he jus "give up," an took to livin like a bum. There's a little money ever month from his disability pension, but most of the time he jus give it away to the other bums.
"I dunno, Forrest," he say, "I guess I'm jus waitin to die or somethin."
Dan han me a few bucks an say to go aroun the corner an git us a couple of bottles of Red Dagger wine. I jus got one bottle tho, an used the money for mine to git one of them ready-made sambwiches, cause I ain't had nothin to eat all day.
"Well, old pal," Dan say after he has polished off half his wine, "tell me what you been doin since I saw you last."
So I did. I tole him about goin to China an playin ping-pong, an findin Jenny Curran again, an playin in The Cracked Eggs band an the peace demonstration where I thowed my medal away an got put in jail.
"Yeah, I remember that one all right. I think I was still here in the hospital. I thought bout going down there mysef, but I guess I wouldn't have thowed my medals away. Look here," he say. He unbutton his jacket an inside, on his shirt, is all his medals - Purple Heart, Silver Star - must of been ten or twelve of them.
"They remind me of somethin," he said. "I'm not quite sure what - the war, of course, but that's jus a part of it. I have suffered a loss, Forrest, far greater than my legs. It's my spirit, my soul, if you will. There is only a blank there now - medals where my soul used to be."
"But what about the 'natural laws' that's in charge of everthin?" I axe him. "What about the 'scheme of things' that we has all got to fit ourself into?"
"Fuck all that," he say. "It was just a bunch of philosophic bullshit."
"But ever since you tole it to me, that's what I been goin by. I been lettin the 'tide' carry me an tryin to do my best. Do the right thing."
"Well, maybe it works for you, Forrest. I thought it was working for me too - but look at me. Just look at me," he say. "What good am I? I'm a goddamn legless freak. A bum. A drunkard. A thirty-five-year-old vagrant."
"It could be worse," I says.
"Oh yeah? How?" he say, an I reckon he got me there, so I finished tellin him bout mysef - gettin thowed in the loony bin an then bein shot up in the rocket an landin down with the cannibals an bout ole Sue an Major Fritch an the pygmies.
