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Piper was in her room getting ready for the day. With her curtains billowing, I didn’t see as much I could have – or wanted – but it was enough that I was regretting not staying in bed a little longer.
“Uncie Roman!” I heard at my door and snubbed the smoke quickly.
I sprayed some heavily scented shit around me and the room before answering, “Yeah?”
“Can you come and read to me while I eat?” Maddy whined.
“Fucking fuck fuckity fucknuts,” I muttered, trying to get it all out of my system so I didn't explode in front of the small, impressionable child.
When I opened the door, Maddy bolted upright like she’d been lying on it.
“Morning,” I said to her.
She grinned up at me. “You sound like a monster in the morning.”
“Beg pardon?” I asked.
“Your voice is all scratchy and growly.”
I nodded. “Sure. Some women will appreciate that,” I said as I pushed past her and headed for the kitchen.
“Why?” Maddy asked.
“Because they like it.”
“They like you sounding like a monster?”
I nodded again as Mum smiled at me. “Bread’s in the toaster,” she said as she ran out of the room to her en suite.
“I don’t like monsters,” Maddy continued.
“I’ll bet you don’t,” I told her as I looked for the coffee.
“Will I when I grow up?”
“Why would you think that?”
“Because you said some women do.”
I nodded. “Right. It’s not liking monsters, Mads. It’s…” Why the fuck did I start this conversation. “It’s called morning voice and some people like it.”
“Why do they like it?”
Because it’s sexy. “Because people like lots of different things for lots of different reasons.”
“Why?”
“That’s a good question, Mads. I don’t know.”
“What do you like?”
Fucking, drinking, smoking and not being awake in the morning. “I like skateboarding.”
“Why?”
Because it was the only thing appropriate to tell her. “Because I’m good at it.”
“I’m good at skipping.”
