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When I saw her at a window in her house, I itched to go to her. To talk to her.
Something felt very final about us now. I didn’t think for a second that she was giving me the kind of brush off I was famous for. But I could believe she was distancing herself from me in case that brush off was coming from me. I needed to tell her that I wasn’t done with her, but I didn’t know how without making this into something more than it already was.
By the time I was down to my last few smokes, the sun was down and Maddy was crying. Screaming was really a more accurate word for it. She sounded in all kinds of pain. I ran out of my room and found Mum in the bathroom, holding a face washer to Maddy’s skin. Maddy clearly didn’t like it.
“Ah,” I said, recognising the scene well. “The old cold face washer trick, huh?”
“She’s almost hit thirty-nine degrees. I know, love,” Mum said to Maddy. “I know it sucks, but it will help.”
I hovered in the door, my heart yanked painfully by the misery on Maddy’s face.
“Uncie Roman…” she whined unhappily.
I knelt down to her and took her hand. “It will help, Mads. Only other option is a cold shower or bath.”
“No!” she said vehemently.
I nodded. “I know. That’s what Grandma used to give your mum and me when we were your age. Itsupersucks.”
“Super sucks?” she asked, her eyes going wide.
“Super sucks.” I looked to Mum. “Do you want me to stay home tonight?”
Mum shook her head. “No. There’s not much you can do. We’ll be fine, won’t we, love?” she asked Maddy.
Maddy nodded, her lip trembling. “Grandma said I can have Zooper Doopers.”
I felt myself smile. “Great plan, Mads. I’ll see you tomorrow?”
“Okay, Uncie Roman.”
I kissed her head, which was burning hot, and gave Mum a hug made awkward by the angle. “All right. I’m out.”
Mum nodded as I hauled myself off the floor. “Night, love.”
“Night.”
“Night, Uncie Roman,” Maddy said.
“Night, Mads. Hope you’re feeling better soon.”
She nodded. “It’s so cold.”
“That’s because your skin’s so hot. Grandma needs to cool it down.”
“Okay.”
I squeezed Mum’s shoulder and got out of there. I heard Maddy crying again, but she was saying, “I know it’s meant to be helping, but I don’t like it!”
As I went to unlock my car, I saw the light on in Piper’s room.
“You’re going to Jimbo’s,” I told myself firmly.
Yet my hand just hovered over the door handle.
“Just forget it. It’s for the best.”
Still my hand wouldn’t open the door.
