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It’s a touch that I wasn’t sure I’d experience again. One that’d dulled in my memory but snapped right back once his fingers made contact with the bare skin of my arm.
“Why are you here?” I grind out, turning on my heel to point at him. “You think my life stopped and I waited for you? I got married! I had children! I created a future you and I could never have.”
“You’re so angry with me and I don’t understand why.” He steps toward me, his hands now at his sides. The frown that mars his face makes me want to shake him. “You left me,Stellina.”
I shake my head before the statement is fully out of his mouth.
“We both know that isn’t true.”
“I tried—”
“Youtried?!” I scoff, hoping my hard gaze pierces through his impenetrable shell. The one I tried so damn hard to break through. “Don’t give me that bullshit. Don’tyoudare give me that bullshit.”
The years are warped with disappointment and having to pretend to be a person I never could keep up with. Abraham may’ve been the master of masks, but I’d learned a thing or two from my time with him.
“That’s it. Give me your anger.” His hands twitch and I remember a time when he’d reach out and pull me toward him, forcing me to face the truth. Thankfully, he keeps his hands to himself this time. “Show me how much I still get under your skin.”
I shake my head before turning away from him. Is it running if I walk away? Do I seem like I care less if I speak less?
“You can’t deny it, so why bother trying?” he shouts after me.
“You’re delusional,” I toss over my shoulder. And then I turn to look at him, walking backwards. “Expecting me to pine over you. You can be the great Abraham Pugliesi to the world, but to me you’re just some guy I used to fuck in college.”
I bolt out of there, not looking back, hoping he doesn’t follow me. And when I realize he didn’t as I’m getting in my car, I try to make sense of my frazzled state.
Yes, I was the one who walked away. I was the one who knew that we were doomed to fail in any life we’d try to create for ourselves.
But he was the one who never answered me when I tried to find him.
When I tried to tell him…
It doesn’t matter anymore.
