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“Lombardi?”
“What are you doing out here?”
I sighed. “Like you said, peace and quiet.”
“You okay?”
There was something in the way he asked that that was nothing like the way other people asked it. It was at the same time a totally off-hand comment, but also an incredibly sincere question; like he was genuinely happy to listen, but also respected I might not want to answer. It took me off-guard for a second.
But again, that lying in the dark on the lakeshore, just the two of us, gave me a sense of security. There was a sense of trust that caused conflict in me. This was Roman, the guy who sneered at everyone, the guy who even traded punches with his closest friend. So when I opened my mouth and I found the truth coming out, I prayed I wasn’t making a terrible mistake.
“Are you ever surrounded by people and you still feel alone?”
“Huh…” He paused. “I’ve never really thought about it. Why? Do you?”
I stared at the stars, glad we weren’t looking at each other. “More often than I used to.”
He was silent a while and I thought he was going to say something rude or teasing, something typically Roman. But, he surprised me.
“Is that why you bailed on the party tonight?”
I took a deep breath. “Sometimes it’s easier to be alone without a whole bunch of people around. You know? Less effort.”
“Less effort how?” he asked, like he was genuinely interested and something twitched in me.
“I don’t know. Like I don’t have to pretend everything’s okay. It gets tiring after a while.”
“So, don’t pretend.”
I scoffed and sat up. “Yeah, because people would accept that Piper Barlow had issues.”
“What does that make me, then?”
I looked back down at him and saw him staring at me intently, like he was actually listening, like maybe he actually cared. Who would have thought that Roman Lombardi was capable of sympathy? My chest did that flutter thing again and I felt like my whole brain was turning itself inside out as it tried to decide if it needed to change its mind about him or not.
“Just because you haven’t actually voiced your disbelief out loud, doesn’t mean you don’t think I’m whining unnecessarily. I’m just waiting for the African orphan speech. Hell, you’ve got real issues with your niece. What right do I have to complain I feel a little down or a little alone sometimes?”
He snorted. “Firstly, that’s bullshit.” He sat up and his shoulder accidentally bumped mine. “No one else’s experiences should invalidate your own feelings, Barlow.”
“I have no reason for it–”
“So what? Feelings don’t listen to reason. I am perfectly happy to accept Piper Barlow has issues and if you want to sit here and not talk about it, fine. You want to talk about it, fine. Let’s just share the peace and quiet and feel a little less alone together.”
I turned to look at him and found him looking out over the lake.
“You’re perfectly happy to accept Piper Barlow has issues?” I asked slowly, trying to stay serious.
A slight grin spread across his face, but he nodded solemnly. “Yes. I’m very understanding that way.”
“About my having issues?”
He still didn’t look at me and that smile looked harder to fight. “Yes.”
I looked over the lake as well and laughed. “Of course you are.”
He skipped another stone and we sat together in companionable silence for a while longer.
Roman leant his elbows on his knees and stared at the lake. I kept sneaking looks at him, wondering if there was more to the enigma than everyone thought. Surely not. Surely the mysterious, arrogant, brooding Roman didn’t have any hidden depths. I’d known him almost half my life just like I’d known most of the people my age in town – when you had one school to go to, you got to know people – and he’d never given me any reason to think he was anything more than what he seemed.
