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Beibhinn drops her spoon into her empty glass and then leans back in the booth before folding her arms across her chest. Her eyes divert upwards as though she’s mentally analysing how much she can tell me. Finally, her gaze settles on mine. “Fuck it!” She leans forward, folding her body over the tabletop before lowering her voice so the other customers can’t hear our discussion. “I shouldn’t be telling you any of this, so if it crops up, play stupid, okay?”
I tilt my chin, acknowledging her with a nod.
“Do you remember when I told you that the Kings of Killybegs were made up of families?”
“Yeah.”
“Family names don’t guarantee a spot at the syndicate table. In order to claim a rightful place, each heir has to go through a set of trials, and they begin right after the person turns eighteen. Tonight is one of Rohan and Aodhán’s trials. They both turned eighteen in the past few weeks.”
Lost for words, my brows narrow, listening intently to every word she spews.What kind of culty shit is this?
“Most of our generation has completed the trials, well, everyone who is of age, except for Rohan, Aodhán, and…” She trails off, eyes searching my face until finally, her unspoken words dawn on me.
“And me.”Is this what Fiadh meant when she said I need to learn how to become a Ryan? Was she trying to prepare me for what is to come when I turn eighteen in a few weeks’ time?
“You said tonight is one of Rohan’s trials? What’s that got to do with Liam?”
“Rohan and Aodhán have to fight — and beat — a syndicate member to pass this part of his initiation. That’s where Liam and Donnacha come in; they’ve both completed their trials.”
“That's…barbaric?”
“You’re telling me. I was the first of our generation of girls to reach eighteen. I had to fight my mam and that woman trains the best fighters in the country. To this day, she swears she didn’t go easy on me, but I know she’s lying.”
I sit wide-eyed, blinking back my disbelief. “Did my mam have to do all this, too?”
“Yes, and from what I heard, Éanna Ryan was a badass. She was the very first female to take the trials, and because she was the first, she had to take down a male member. Apparently, Rohan’s dad got his arse handed to him that night, or so my mother told me.”
Before I know it, the question that has been tumbling around my head since Beibhinn insinuated my role in all this stumbles off my tongue. “What if we don’t want to initiate?”
“We don’t get a choice, Saoirse. There has only been one person who refused to complete all of the trials.”
It dawns on me. “My mam?”
Beibhinn nods, her eyes brimming with sadness and pity.
Is this why she ran, why she refused to never tell me about her life, why she spent years of her life running? Because of the syndicate?
“We were born into this life, Saoirse, and either you’re in it or you’re silenced. There’s no other option.”
Beibhinn looks down at the time displayed on her phone screen before she pushes from the booth and tips her chin towards the door. “We should get going. The fight will be starting soon.”
