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Derek stopped laughing and straightened back up. “So… are you in, or out?”
I started crying. I couldn’t help myself.
“I don’t want to lose you,” I sobbed.
Ryan hugged me, held me close to his body. “You just walked out the door. You were going to
choose
to lose us.”
“But… I just got you back…”
“We already decided to do it,” Derek pointed out. “We don’t
have
to – but we already said yes in our heads, so we’re just giving you the option.”
Ryan looked down at me. “Be honest… is this something you want?”
“What if it turns out bad?”
“That’s not what I asked. Forget the fear – is this something you want?”
I held my breath.
I could feel my cheeks radiating heat as I blushed scalding red.
And I nodded ‘yes.’
120
It all happened naturally from there.
If you ever get the chance to make love to two gorgeous men at the same time, both of whom are hopelessly in love with you, I would highly recommend you take them up on the offer.
It is, as Ferriss Beuller would say,
SO choice.
121
Ryan was the first to move. He cupped my face in his hands and leaned over and kissed me, slowly… sensually.
As I closed my eyes and gave myself over to the kiss, another pair of hands slowly touched my waist.
Derek.
He brushed aside my hair, and I felt his warm lips on the back of my neck.
I shivered, and a jumble of emotions surged through me all at once: fear. Excitement. Desire. Shame. Love. Longing. Uncertainty.
Were we really going to do this?
Was this
really
going to happen?
As Ryan continued to kiss me, one of Derek’s hands tugged at my blouse, pulled it up out of my skirt, and brushed across my bare skin.
Holy SHIT, this really WAS going to happen.
I parted lips with Ryan, then felt a gentle tug at my hair. I turned my head slowly, as though in a trance – and Derek’s lips were there to meet mine.
With Ryan’s taste still in my mouth, now I had Derek’s, as well – the slightly darker, smokier taste of his lips, his tongue.
It felt wrong.
But it was sooooo
hot.
Ryan began to nuzzle my neck at the same time, and I sighed out loud, my eyes rolling back in my head. Ryan’s lips were hot against my skin, slightly sticky pulls of friction with little wet caresses of his tongue.
I sighed again, not quite believing this was real. Maybe this was all a fantasy in my head. Maybe they had both rejected me and I’d snapped. Maybe I had gone crazy, and none of this was really happening.
Derek kissed me deeper, and I felt his right hand trace up under my blouse, slowly move over my bra, and cup the weight of my breast in his palm.
At the same time, Ryan’s hand moved down to the curve of my ass and slowly caressed me.
Nope, this was happening, all right.
But it was soooo slow… hypnotic… like a dream. The best dream possible.
I broke away from Derek’s kiss and turned my head. Ryan sensed the movement, and slowly kissed his way up my neck, to my jaw, to my lips.
Derek’s taste lingered in my mouth as I kissed Ryan again, and was flooded with the sweetness of his mouth.
Derek began unfastening my skirt.
“Wait,” I whispered.
Derek stopped. So did Ryan.
“Turn out the lights first,” I breathed.
Five seconds later, the lights were out, with our bodies barely illuminated by the city lights of Austin outside.
122
Derek started on my skirt again, and I felt it drop away to the floor.
Now two hands – one belonging to each man – began to caress my thighs, my ass, my naked skin.
My panties were absolutely soaked.
I felt Derek’s fingers pass over them, slipping over the wet material, gliding over the shape of my swollen clit.
I gasped, my mouth raised to the ceiling – and I felt both of them kiss me, first on either side of my face, then either ear, then down my neck on opposing sides.
Each of them grabbed one of my breasts – Ryan gently, Derek rougher and more urgent. Ryan began to circle my left nipple, making it harder and firmer; Derek tweaked my right nipple between his fingers, sending a delicious spike of almost-pain through my body, heightening my pleasure.
I hesitated to do it… part of me thought I shouldn’t… that I was a slut if I did… a bad,
bad
girl… but I wanted it too much, so I let my hands find each of their bodies and trace from their thighs to the front of their pants – Derek’s jeans, Ryan’s slacks.
And I found exactly what I was looking for.
A firm, hard pressure in each hand.
I cupped my fingers around the hardness in each of my palms, letting their girth fill my fingers, rubbing up and down.
