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In the end, though, the cumulative price tag was just too much – even though everything was reasonably priced. I only took a couple pairs of jeans and two long sleeve shirts with me out of the dressing room.

“What, that’s it?” Ryan asked, perplexed. “I thought you liked the rest. I mean, it’s not high fashion or anything – ”

“I can’t afford more than this,” I said. Truth was, I couldn’t even afford the two outfits.

He groaned and rolled his eyes. “Kaitlyn – ”

“I can’t keep asking you to buy stuff for me.”

“You’re not asking. I’m offering.”

“This is a waste of your money. I mean, how long am I going to

be

here, anyway?!”

“I’m here for two months. You’re here for as much of that as you want.”

“All this for two months?”

“So wear it to the local hoedown when you go back to New York,” he joked.

“Ryan…”

“Am I going to have to repeat the fifty bucks speech? Except this time, it’s going to be more like the two bucks speech.”

“Ryan – ”

“Kaitlyn, do me the favor of not making me go into the women’s changing room to grab your stuff.”

I did him that favor, at least.

We also got a couple of pairs of shoes: some sexy, feminine cowboy boots and a pair of plain brown shoes for around the house. Plus a half-dozen socks for each. Plus a pair of cheap sunglasses Ryan picked up at the register.

As the sales lady rang up the clothes, I noticed Ryan eyeing the Daisy Dukes, which he hadn’t seen me wear yet.

He didn’t say anything… but I noticed his eyebrows raise the tiniest bit.

It didn’t make me uncomfortable.

In fact, I would be lying if I said it didn’t make me feel a little flattered.

And maybe a tiny bit excited.

21

We put the clothes in the truck and ate lunch at a little sidewalk place that apparently only locals frequented. Lots of meat on the menu. I opted for a steak sandwich.

We chatted a little, talked about the local temperatures (highs in the 80’s, lows at night in the 50’s), and joked about going to the local casino when I got cabin fever.

Along the way, I asked to stop by the local pharmacy. While Ryan was browsing the magazines, I surreptitiously fulfilled my prescription for the NuvaRing. Not that I was planning on doing anything, but I’d been on birth control for a couple years. There was no reason to stop now just because I had gone through a breakup. Hell, I’d always made Derek use a condom (at least when I wasn’t hallucinating on mushrooms) even though I couldn’t get pregnant. Why stop now?

When we got back to the ranch, Ryan asked if I wanted to go horseback riding. I declined, so he headed to the studio to work on some music for the band, and I wandered into the library. It was just a small room with bookshelves on every wall and a comfortable desk and chair in the center. As for books, there was a little bit of everything, from World War II pulp fiction military novels (which I’m assuming had belonged to Ryan’s grandfather) to Jane Austen to Harold Robbins paperbacks. I went unconventional (for me) and settled on a book titled

Papillon

about a French safecracker in the mid 20th century who was sentenced to life on Devil’s Island. The paperback’s cover – which was very old and crinkled – screamed, “Now a Major Motion Picture Starring Steve McQueen and Dustin Hoffman!” To be honest, that’s probably what sold me on it.

I did laundry – both my new acquisitions and my clothes from the tour – as I became engrossed in the book. It all felt very domestic… and relaxing.

And happy.

I was even able to forget about Derek for awhile.

Well… I was able to forget about him in fifteen minute increments, anyway.

Around 5PM, Ryan came out and asked, “Hey, do you mind if I get your opinion on something?” He led me back to the studio and played a couple of tracks on the computer. There weren’t any lyrics, and the drums were minimal at best, but they were still pretty great. One was a heavy, driving asskicker, and the other was a slower, more contemplative, darker tune. The bass part, in particular, was awesome. The guitar part was good, but definitely not up to Killian Lee standards.

“That’s great – how long have you been working on those?” I asked.

“Since we got back this afternoon.”

I stared at him. “What?!”

“Well, I mean, I didn’t come up with the tunes since we got back. I just kind of laid down some stuff I’d been thinking about.”

“You mean… you just walk around coming up with music in your head?”

“Yeah.”

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