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I take it from my jacket and cringe at the sight of Vanessa’s name flashing on my screen. Vanessa Hilbert is the daughter of one of our esteemed board members, Mathew Hilbert.
“Who’s that?” Zander nods toward my cell phone.
“No one important,” I reply casually, placing the phone back in my jacket, hoping he’ll drop it.
But he raises an eyebrow at me and not in a fun way. “Are you sure?”
“What’s with all these questions?”
“Nothing. I was wondering if you have something you want to share with your elder brother.”
“Don’t throw the ‘elder bro’ card at me. You’re only two years older. Spit it out, Zander.”
“Was it Vanessa?” His question should surprise me, but somehow it doesn’t. Zander always makes sure he’s aware of the happenings in my and Zane’s lives. As much as I hate his interrogation, I know I’m fortunate to have him looking out for me.
“What do you mean? Why do you think it was Vanessa?” My insides twitch with a hint of guilt.
“You tell me, Zach. What the hell is wrong with you? Vanessa, really?”
“I still don’t understand,” I reply nonchalantly.
“I saw you with her at the café and I wasn’t fucking alone. Rose was with me too.”
I cringe internally, both at my stupidity of taking Vanessa somewhere my brother could easily spot me and at my fucking bad luck.
“First, I thought maybe you guys were catching up or something, but Zane told me that Vanessa frequently visits your place.” He looks at me and I hate how the expression on his face morphs from anger to sympathy to sheer pity.
“There was a time she was our friend.” I shrug and try to avoid the unavoidable.
“Friend? Are you kidding me? She stopped being our friend a long time back. She used to hit on me until only recently.” He runs a hand through his hair in exasperation. “Did you already forget how she treated Rose?”
“I didn’t forget anything,” I reply in anger to mask my shame. “Maybe it’s time you back off a little. Let me handle my life. Your constant bother is fucking suffocating.” I regret the words as soon as they’re out of my mouth. My brother’s head jerks up, and he looks at me like I just slapped him.
Before I can apologize, Rose’s voice startles us. “Zach.” She joins us, oblivious to our conversation. “I thought you left.” She stands near my brother and instinctively his arms go around her shoulders as always. “Zander made this for you.” She hands me a plastic box.
Fuck! I know what’s in it. As if I wasn’t already drowning in shame for hurting my brother with words, he would make me my childhood favorite chocolate chip pancakes. Only this week I told him how much I miss his cooking, especially the pancakes.
“Thanks.” I don’t meet my brother’s eye. “I’ll leave now. It was a great evening.”
“Zach, we want you to be happy,” Rose says and moves her hand between her and my brother. “If you would like to invite Vanessa next time, it wouldn’t be…that bad. I think.”
I chuckle at her words. “Not that bad, huh?” I look at Zander who kisses her head. I smile at her innocence and honesty. I hope she never changes.
Leaning forward, I take her hand in mine and kiss her forehead. “I could never do that to you, sis. Vanessa is just an acquaintance.”
She’s quiet for a moment, considering my words as she does for most things. “Okay.”
My heart fillswith unease as I drive through the narrow roads of St. Peppers. I hate myself for hurting my brother when he’s just looking out for me. I hate that I still need someone to look out for me.
“Shit!” I brake as a ball of fur dashes across the street.
My hands on the steering wheel tighten at the sight of a young kid chasing a puppy.
Where the hell are his parents?
I wait for a few beats to see if he returns from the fields they just ran into, and that’s when I seethem. Three boys, teenagers probably, following the kid. They’re shouting and calling names that I don’t hear clearly from the inside of my car.
My heart skips a beat, and my palms turn clammy over the wheel. Images of my own childhood surface.
