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“Not from where I stood. The guy showed an interest.”
“I played it too careful. I was so worried I was going to break the momentum when I should have pushed.”
“No, you played it cool.”
“I kept looking at Blondie and Red over there.” She glanced where the women were wrapped around Lloyd’s friends. “Those men took the bait. They’re practically having sex right now.”
Eric gave a comforting squeeze on her shoulder. “You shouldn’t compare yourself. Blondie and Red obviously have their own agendas. And so did those guys.”
“I should have followed their lead.” It went against her instincts with Lloyd, but it would have gotten the results she wanted.
“No.”
She closed her eyes. Right. Her overtures would have paled in comparison with those women right next to her. Eric saw that right away, and she just proved to him that she wasn’t sexy. Why couldn’t the floor swallow her up whole?
“Yeah—” she cleared her throat “—I don’t think I could have pulled off that level of sexy.”
“No, you misunderstood me.”
“It’s okay, Eric.” She rolled the empty beer bottle between her hands. “You were right. I wasn’t a good choice. I’m sorry I made you give me the job.”
“I’m not.”
No, he wouldn’t. He knew she needed this wake-up call. The next time she wanted to break out of her cubicle, Perry would only have to mention the Lloyd incident. It would be enough to shut her up.
She truly needed this assignment to have been a success. Not just for her team, but for herself. She had waited so long for her turn. She had imagined how great she would be, how she would shine if only she had a chance for the spotlight.
The hope that always pushed her forward was gone. Now she regretted grabbing for the chance. She wished she hadn’t tried to live her dream. If she hadn’t tried she could still pretend anything was possible.
“I’m sorry this was a waste of time,” she said.
“No, it wasn’t a waste,” Eric insisted. “We needed the practice.”
“Well, the practice was wasted on me. I’m not doing it again.” She gathered up her courage and met Eric’s gaze. The kind understanding she saw in his blue eyes nearly destroyed her. “You’ll need to find someone else to be a decoy. I quit.”
7
QUITTING? ERIC STIFFENED. That didn’t sound like Julie. She wasn’t a quitter. It was a quality of hers that he admired and found exasperating in equal measures. She wanted to do anything and everything, as if she were making up for lost time. If she didn’t have the skills, she got by with her drive and energy.
But now, after one try, she was going to quit being a decoy. This was what he wanted, right?
Eric saw the dullness in her blue eyes. It was as if the light—the joy—were snuffed right out of her. He wanted to protect her, but not at the cost of her enthusiasm.
He wasn’t good at pep talks, but he’d give it a shot. “Listen, Julie…”
She released a deep breath. “I don’t want your pity.”
“Good, because you don’t have it,” he insisted. “I admit you surprised me tonight.”
“I know.” She tiredly rubbed her head. “The military jacket was a bad call. I took it off to show more skin, but it didn’t do me any good.”
“The alias worked,” he insisted. “Lloyd allowed you to get a lot closer to him than Blondie and Red.”
“More like Blondie and Red were already occupied.”
Eric dipped his head and pressed his mouth against her ear. “I’m only going to say this once, so listen closely. You have a skill in observation. You notice signs that reveal something about a person. That takes years of training, but it’s almost as if it comes natural to you.”
“So, I’m a great people watcher. Big whoop.” She pressed her lips together and shook her head. “I’m sorry. I don’t mean to take my disappointment out on you. I appreciate that you’re trying to cheer me up.”
“But I suck at it?”
A reluctant smile pulled at her lips. “Something like that.”
“Fair enough.” He straightened and turned her bar stool so she had to face him. “I’ll focus on my strengths and stick to the facts. There were no indications that Lloyd would be unfaithful to his girlfriend. Martha volunteered him. That was the only reason we chose him as a target.”
