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3
Randy
“I’m trying to tell you, she was the best lay that I’ve had in a while,” my buddy Jethro insists. The bastard is a handsome guy, so I know he has no trouble attracting women. Still, this is quite the proclamation, and I shoot him a smirk.
“Really, the best? Asshole, I hear that from you every other day about every woman you take to bed,” I grump. “I’m starting to think you’re just easy to please.”
Jethro chuckles again before gulping down his Coke. When he’s done, he lets out a belch of satisfaction and then chucks the can into the trash before turning to me.
“Well, at least I can say that I have a story to tell now and then,” he says in a smug tone. “I haven’t heard a word from you about how things are going in the sack for who knows how long now. I’m starting to think you’re not getting any, which I know isn’t true. Ever since that calendar came out, whoo-wee! Fuck me, but the ladies have been lining up. How was that last one you met at the bar? The one with the plastic boobies and big, blown-up lips?”
I grimace because I’d prefer not to remember Kristen. Or Krissy. Or whatever her name was. I merely smile tightly.
“I have no idea how she is,” I growl, “because I don’t keep in touch with Barbie.”
Jethro lets out a cackle.
“Of course not,” he says. “Who would? There’s nothing going on upstairs, although what’s going on between her thighs could make it worthwhile.”
I merely roll my eyes again.
“Whatevs. They’re all the same. Boring. Just quickies that I forget about as soon as we’re done. Honestly, I never even get their names half the time.”
Jethro winces this time. “Damn. The women you’ve been taking to bed recently have been that bad?”
I shrug.
“It’s not that they’re bad. They just…” I pause as I try to figure out my next words. “They don’t compare, I guess.”
Jethro stares at me, his blue eyes curious.
“Compare to what? Your mama?”
I sigh again.
“No, it’s just that a couple of months ago I was with this girl at my brother’s restaurant opening. She was drop-dead gorgeous and exactly my type with those big tits and bigger bottom. Plus, she had the face too—real pretty. Just the way I like my women.”
My buddy smirks.
“Yeah, you’ve always been one for the face.”
I shake my head, ignoring him. “Anyways, we did it at the party, and it was fantastic. It was fucking raunchy too because I took her out back and fucked her in the open.” My buddy lets out a whistle and I nod. “If anything, it only made the sex even better. Knowing that she wanted me so badly that she was willing to bend over behind a dumpster really did something to me. That and the fact that this woman held nothing back. I’ve never heard a girl moan so loud in my life before. Fuck,” I curse, remembering the event. After all, my words are true. Sam hadn’t been shy at all. It was as if she didn’t care whether or not we got caught just as long as we got to have our fun. She wasn’t ashamed of cursing in my ear and screaming my name for the neighbors to hear either. She was extremely vocal, and she let me know exactly what she wanted and how much she enjoyed it too, which in turn, heightened my pleasure.
“Dayum,” Jethro murmurs, his eyes wide. I nod.
“And you know, it isn’t just the sex either,” I continue after a pause. “Something about her was just so…I don’t know. I don’t know how to describe it. All I know is that being with other women just doesn’t compare, and sex hasn’t been the same since. I can’t get Samantha’s beautiful smile or those pretty eyes of hers out of my head. Her face is the only one I see when I’m with someone else. Literally, even when I’m fucking another woman, I’m still seeing her.”
My friend shakes his head with amazement.
“Well, shee-it,” he drawls. “Sounds like you got it bad, my brother. But what’s the problem then? If you like this girl so much, why are you still sleeping with other women? That’s pretty fucked up, right?” he remarks. But then a thought strikes and his eyes go wide. “Unless she’s your sister or something? Or your cousin? Or your stepmom?”
I snort at his ridiculousness.
“No, she’s not. We’re not related, you fucking dumbs.”
He nods amiably.
“Oh good. Then, my man, I ask again: what’s the problem?”
I frown.
“There’s no problem.”
Jethro shoots me another look.
