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We were going through that at the moment because of Finn and Aoife too.
Dealing with the aftermath of their loss was one thing, but Eoghan had been tense since we’d returned from Ireland.
“You’ve been acting strangely since we got home. What is it? What’s wrong?”
Finally, he looked at me, and though his face was the same, his eyes were…
I blinked.
They weren’t just cold.
They werefrigid.
He never looked at me that way.
The instinctive response was to back off, but because this was Eoghan, and we’d already been forged in fire, if anything, I tightened my arms around him.
“You can tell me anything, babe. There’s nothing you’ve done or could do that would make me turn my back on you.”
His mouth twisted into a sneer. “That’s only because you don’t know the half of what I’ve done.”
“I know you were a sniper for the Forces. I know you’re The Whistler.” His muscles bunched at that. Obstinately, I stared him down, just prepared for him to argue with me. “I know what you are, Eoghan, and I love you anyway.
“I’m from the same world as you.” I placed my hand on his stomach, the flat of it settling against the divots of his abdomen. “I’m not afraid.”
“Maybe you should be,” he rumbled, his head angled down. “If I were you, I would be. I’m a fucking monster.”
“Where’s this coming from?” I whispered, not liking to hear him talk about himself that way.
My father was a monster.
Eoghan wasnot.
“It’s coming from nowhere,” he denied. “I need to shower. I got shit to do today.”
“You have to do me,” I pointed out, trying to tease him, but it didn’t work.
He didn’t laugh.
I let go of him, feeling the brush of that cold shoulder like it was a gust of wind from Siberia, and watched as he placed the dumbbells down on the bench.
He grabbed the disinfectant from the place where he kept it, and I watched him clean up everything we’d touched during our workout.
He was usually anal about being clean, but he left this stuff for the help.
Today, however, he didn’t, and I’d know—I watched him wipe every piece of equipment we’d used.
Eoghan even cleaned the damn disinfectant after he was finished, then he left the gym and me behind.
Not once had he looked at me since I’d slipped my arms around his waist.
Not once.
And seeing as I was wearing a sports bra that shaped my tits and biker shorts that made my ass lookfine, that was confirmation right there that something funky was going on with my husband.
Traipsing after him, even more perturbed than before, I headed into the bathroom and watched him wade under the rainfall showerhead.
“Eoghan, I want to know what’s wrong.”
