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Two men I’d goddamn loved, who’d felt it too.
“He is,” Paddy whispered. “I need your da’s help, boys.”
Aidan shuffled on his feet, pain creasing his expression. “I think, first things first, you gotta make him believe you ain’t dead.”
Though he grimaced, Paddy nodded. “I get that. It was a shitty fucking thing to do, but I didn’t have a choice.”
“We always have a choice.”
“Not when you fuck with the ECD’s plans, Aidan,” Paddy discounted.
His words had someone walking over my grave. The hairs at my nape stood to attention like good soldiers, and a shudder worked its way down my spine, because I knew he wasn’t bullshitting.
Better than Aidan, at any rate.
“Liam Donnghal—” I paused, corrected, “Liam, he’s been gone a few weeks, hasn’t he?”
“I couldn’t get the money together. They sent me his fucking ear.” Tears welled in his eyes, great big drops that poured over his cheeks. One thing could be said about the old generations—they weren’t afraid to show their emotions. “That’s why I came here. I knew Acuig was doing well, and I knew Aidan would help if it was for family.”
I stepped back and away from him, Junior did too, pretty much at the same time.
Warily, though, I said, “You should come inside.”
“Da’s private office is on the compound, but I haven’t heard the golf carts so he must still be in the house,” Aidan reasoned, prompting me to nod my head in agreement.
Heading inside first, I looked around, half expecting to find an audience, but the foyer was eerily quiet.
In fact, I couldn’t hear voices from any part of the house, not even the kitchen where the women tended to congregate.
Either Lena had disappeared and gone to her room or Aoife was hiding out somewhere else.
Concerned, I turned to Aidan and I muttered, “I’ll be five minutes.”
“Where are you going?”
“I need to find Aoife.”
“Why?” he argued.
“I just do.”
I didn’t wait for a discussion or his goddamn approval because I needed neither. I headed to the kitchen, only to find that my assumption was right—Aoife wasn’t in there. No one was aside from Lena who was cooking on her own.
She must have heard my shoes against the tiles because she looked up and shot me a sad smile. “It’s okay, son.”
Her words had my jaw clenching. “Nothing is fucking okay, Lena.” I wanted to hurl at her that I wasn’t her son, but that was my anger talking. For all intents and purposes, I goddamn was. Emotions battling inside me, I rasped, “Where’s Aoife?”
“They’re all in the conservatory.” She pressed her hand to her throat. “I didn’t expect you to come today.”
“Neither did I. I won’t apologize for the flowerbeds.”
“After what I did, I deserve worse. I’ll…” Lena swallowed. “I don’t know what to do, Finn.”
“You think I do? She made me promise not to put the family before her again. I intend to stick to that promise, Lena, but this is her family too now. How the hell—” I shook my head. “How am I supposed to make this right?”
She stared down at the potatoes in her hands. “If I had the answers, I’d give them to you.”
Mouth tight, I stepped back.
