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Fifty-Eight
Conor
A week later
“Where the hell are you, Lodestar?”I grumbled under my breath as I tried to send her another message.
I knew she’d been working on dismantling the Sparrows’ massive funding network, and over the last few weeks, since Savannah’s initial press release which exposed Lodestar’s findings, bank accounts associated with the secret society had been handed over to the US Attorney.
But ever since our last video call when she’d opened her belated Christmas gift, she’d gone silent.
I’d scoured her usual hunting grounds, trying to see if I could find a trace of her, but she was quiet.
Stone-cold quiet.
She was a deadly weapon shaped like a female, but that didn’t mean she was bulletproof.
If Savannah was getting death threats, maybe she was too.
Maybe she was already dead.
My fear meant that I’d been less productive than I should be.
The program that was running double speed to filter through the thousands of hours of recordings from across the Five Points had targeted conversations that I needed to listen to, but I’d been ignoring them.
My concern was for Lodestar.
We hadn’t argued since before that video call, so I knew she wasn’t mad at me. She’d even said shelikedthe gift, so it wasn’t that.
All this was why I was making the drive to New Jersey.
Brennan and Declan were right.
She wasn’t on Angel One.
She was in West Orange.
Just a drive away.
And Finn was right too.
I deservedmore.
I deserved to have a future with the woman I wanted without my past fucking shit up for me.
Approaching another faction’s territory wasn’t a smart move, but where Star made me stupid, I wasn’t smart. She did something to me, made my life easier somehow even though, case in point now, she made it harder too.
With her in my world, I worked harder and attained more. She kept me on my toes. Reminded me that you had to earn perfection.
She made me laugh; she got me mad.
She was my equal.
My balance.
Without her, everything was more difficult. Sleeping was harder. Eating was no fun.
Was this what love felt like?
