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Penis Cakes
Leigh
Iflipofftheburner and slide a quesadilla onto a plate for Nick. I add a huge dollop of sour cream to the side and pour his favorite hot sauce over the quesadilla.
“Babe, lunch is ready!” I call.
Nick walks in from the office and drops down at the table with a groan.
“Hey, what’s wrong?”
“I got my acceptance packet from BU.”
My eyes get huge. “Baby! That’s incredible. I’m so proud of you.” I stop fawning when he doesn’t move. “Why aren’t you excited? I thought that’s where you wanted to go.”
I sit down next to him, watching as he rubs his face with the palms of his hands. “I do. I guess.”
“What’s going on?”
He sighs. “I don’t know. I guess I haven’t stopped to really think about all this since we’ve had Hunter. I don’t know if BU is a good idea.”
“Why not?”
“Because it’s expensive as hell and—”
“I don’t care about that. It’s why student loans exist. If that’s the worst we have to deal with, that’ll be fine.”
He sighs again. “I know. But my grades have already slipped and that’s just high school. With working and Hunter—”
“Stop.”
“No.” He stands up, getting agitated. I stand up too. I am the queen of the frustrated pace, after all. “I—I don’t know if I should go there if I can’t fully commit to it.”
“You know what most people don’t say? That they wish theywouldn’thave tried something.” My face sours. “Except maybe drugs. But when it comes to something like this, would you rather try and have to readjust if it doesn’t work like you want? Or would you rather not try at all and wonder what if?” He frowns at me. “Is BU where you want to go?”
He shrugs. “I guess. They have an amazing business program. You know, I don’t just want to take over my dad’s business one day, I want to keep building its legacy, and I think I could learn a lot going there. But that doesn’t necessarily make it the right decision. I mean, Maia and Vince are both going to SUNY Broome first and then—”
“I don’t care what they’re doing. I care what you do. If you want to do this, there’s no reason you shouldn’t.”
He leans against the counter. “I just feel a little lost. I used to be the guy who lived for the next party. And I don’t miss it, but that’s what I thought of for college. Getting away, having fun, enjoying the full college experience. Then suddenly no one else was going away for school. I don’t know.”
I step in front of him and slowly glide my hands up his arms. “Is there somewhere else you want to go? Because we can move. I can find a job—”
“No. I don’t want to leave our family and friends. I definitely don’t want to take Hunter from them. I like BU. I just want to be sure it’s the right decision.”
“If it’s the right decision for you, it’s the right decision for me.”
He shoves off the counter and starts pacing again. “But is it the right decision forus?For Hunter?”
“Nick, if this is something you want, that’s the right decision. If you’re worried about money, don’t be. This is a great apartment. Sure, it has its quirks, but it works well for us. I can comfortably afford the way we live on my salary. If we need to take out a loan for your tuition, we’ll do that. If you need to work less, your dad will understand. We’ll figure this out, but don’t give up on what you want because the path is uncertain.” I step in front of him and run my fingers through his hair.
He softens and wraps his arms around me, looking into my eyes. “You deserve to have what you want, too.”
My brow furrows. “I already do. Do you not realize that? Our life—thisiswhat I want. More than anything. And I love my job. I never wanted the traditional college experience. I hate school. I want to take some business and fashion classes to learn more, but I can work those in over summers or whenever. I’m happy. I need you to do what makes you happy, too.That’swhat’s best for all of us.”
He stares at me for a minute, then says, “I want to go to BU.”
I throw my hands up in the air. “Yes!” I give him a hard kiss. “Now, go fill out whatever you need to for acceptance.”
