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CHAPTERSIX
“What are you saying?” Della kept her voice low, her muscles still. As if any interruption might break the crackling tension. She didn’t want to lose this moment so full of possibility, the air pulsed with it.
“I trust you.” He moved closer to her. “I like you. I like the man I am around you. And damn it all to hell, but I’m so tired of holding in the secrets. I didn’t even know the price I paid until I met you. I want to tell you the real story.”
“I want to hear it.” She perched on the arm of the couch. “And I won’t tell a soul.”
“I know.” His grin cracked the tension. “We’re not talking state secrets here. It’s just that I’ve been lying for so fucking long, and I think what started out as embarrassment has turned into shame.” His gaze flicked over to her, assessing her reaction.
“What on earth do you have to be ashamed of?”
He scrubbed his face with both hands. “Right, so I started out performing by myself. Usually, it was just a bunch of tourists watching. But one day, a kid from school walked by. I felt a little self-conscious, but I didn’t think much of it, but when I got to school the next day, I found out he’d told everyone about me.” He paused. “And not in a good way.”
She went very, very still, her heart pounding like a drum. Every protective instinct she had gathered in a big, volatile ball of energy. “What do you mean?”
“When I walked into the cafeteria, they started singing in high-pitched voices. It was the first time I’d ever been embarrassed about my music. It shook my confidence.”
“I can imagine.”
“It sucked, but I could handle it. Since we’d moved so much, I’d always kept to myself anyway. The part that was harder to deal with was when they made fun of my financial situation.”
If she didn’t think it would make him even more uncomfortable, she’d launch off this couch and throw her arms around him. Instead, she gave him her full attention.
“When I walked down the hall, they’d throw coins at me. They—”
“Those fuckers. Seriously, fuck them for making you stop something you loved.”
“I didn’t stop.” He grinned at her. “Because fuck them.”
Laughter outside the bus made him flinch. “Van’s here.”
She got up. “And he’s brought some friends.”
“Yeah. Do you want to…” He tipped his head toward his room, inviting her in.
Before she could answer, the doors whooshed open, and Scat said, “Find a seat.” He said it loud enough, she knew it was intended as a warning. “We’re hitting the road now.”
Bex pulled her into his room and locked the door. It was a tiny space that fit little more than the queen bed. The walls had cabinets, and an open door led to an airplane-size bathroom. He bunched some pillows and sat up at the head of the bed, patting the space next to him.
Once she got settled, she said, “So, you kept singing?”
“Hell, yeah. The money was too good to pass up. But when Van caught on to what was happening, he showed up to sing with me. And since he couldn’t leave Hannah and Chance alone, they joined us. My mom came, too, whenever she could, just in case someone tried to call Child Protective Services on us. We became pretty popular, got invited to events like mall openings and shit like that. And then one day, a producer came along and wanted to sign us. But the thing was…” His fingertips tapped on the blanket. “I didn’t like it. I’m not an actor, so performing wasn’t my thing. I’m not into getting the audience excited…I’m not a showman.”
“But the chicks, man. You’re supposed to do it for the chicks.” She immediately regretted her thinly veiled attempt to find out whether he screwed around on the road. After being this true with her, he deserved an equal amount of courage and transparency. “I know you’re not like Van.” She gestured to the giggling women on the other side of the door. “But…did you ever…were you ever into that kind of thing?”
But she already knew the answer. Because what she’d come to know of him, it wasn’t possible.
He needs connection, intimacy. Just like me.
He chuckled, shaking his head. “Nah, that’s not my scene. Never has been.”
“But you’re gorgeous and sexy and…I mean, look at you. Women fight for your attention. I saw it in the herbalist shop and the grocery store. I see it everywhere we go. People stop talking and stare at you. And you’re wearing a disguise, so they don’t know you’re a rock star.”
With a thoughtful expression, he smoothed the comforter. “I can appreciate a beautiful woman. I can get hard looking at a great body, but intimacy…even a kiss…it grows out of getting to know someone, feeling connected to them.” He was looking at her mouth with such intensity, her skin went hot. “So, yeah. I leave that action to my brother.”
“It’s funny you say that. I’d had a crush on Van Claybourne for years, but when I met him, I didn’t even feel even a hint of attraction.”
“Yeah? Not into my brother?” He seemed extremely interested in her answer.
