AllFreeNovel
Share Us
“This is going to be great fun,” Jamie complains, watching his sister scowl as she shoves her headphones into her ears and glares at me.
“Whatever.” It’s kind of sweet when she grumbles. “Let’s just go.”
Mikaela
“Mik?” Ben’s hand is on my shoulder as he crouches beside me, gently brushing the stray tendrils of my hair from my neck as I gasp for breath. There are black spots floating through the space around me and my head is thumping as my heart sputters and stumbles. “Are you okay?”
I don’t have the energy to shrug off his touch as I sit with my head between my knees and try to focus on breathing. My lungs are burning and my insides started screaming at me to stop twenty minutes ago because I was stupid and tried to match the pace of the two of them. It was a bad idea, I know that, but I didn’t want Ben to see that I’m weaker now. Benjamin Haston knowing I have been so reckless with my life is not something I ever want. I take another burning breath as I tell myself it’s because he’d never let me forget it - he’d hold it over me and judge me harshly and I have had enough judgement to last a lifetime - but the idea of him seeing me so damaged makes my heart squeeze painfully.
“I’m fine.” I close my eyes for a moment before pushing myself up to my feet.
Darkness encroaches quickly, blanketing where I stand, and I stumble, my head suddenly light and my limbs detached.
“Shit.” His breath releases on a hiss as a horn sounds and warm hands grip my waist, pulling me back into a wide chest, away from the edge of the road and into his arms.
His palm is flat against my stomach as my hoodie hangs off of my shoulders and I freeze. My whole body seizes up beneath his touch.
“You should sit down again, Mik.”
I try to breathe, my mind reeling as ice floods my veins, and his touch remains firm against me.
“Let go of me.” I am weak. I am fearful and pathetic and I don’t care. I don’t care about anything except for the fact I can feel his hands on my skin and I can’t breathe.
“Mik?” His hand slips from my stomach, but he remains close against me, spinning me to face him. His fingers rest against my waist with ease, as if he has always held me like this, and he furrows his brow and ducks down to look at me. I can feel my lips trembling, my heart rate spiking again, and I drop my eyes to the floor. “What’s wrong?”
“I said let go.” I don’t know what to do. I don’t know where to turn or look. Jamie ran ahead of us earlier and Ben held back when I started to lag. Now, as he holds me close and people continue their morning routines around us, I feel like I’m suffocating.
Because, despite the fact Iknowit’s Ben’s hands on my hips, I don’t see him.
I push him off of me and back away. He steps forwards just the tiniest amount as my hand cups my throat and I feel my last shred of control slipping. When I start to run again, I run alone, straight back to the apartment. This time the desire to puke isn’t coming from the pain in my side, or the complete lack of exercise I’ve had for months. This time the nausea comes with a face and a name and hands that I can still feel all over my body, and I need to shower. I need to scrub him off.
Maxpullshischairthrough the office, nodding politely at every single person who stares at him with interest or disapproval, and whistles to himself. When he gets to my desk, he throws himself down and spins dramatically as he eyes me with an intense sort of intrigue. “Why so frowny today, Mikaela?”
I chuff out a laugh as I continue to scratch ideas down in my notebook, hoping something might stick while I have a brief lull from enquiring phone calls and authors with too much authority barking demands at me. “Just busy today, Max.”
“Lies.”
A small scream leaves me as Max snatches my notebook from my hands and for a moment I forget that we aren’t alone, only to be brought back to reality by the judgemental tutting of the ice blonde Queen Bee office manager as she struts behind my desk towards Jamie’s office. Glancing back to me, Max laughs that joyous laugh again, cracking my own smile in half as he spins away and I give in to his playful demeanour, desperately trying to crawl over him to retrieve my notes. I laugh while I claw at him and he pushes me back into my chair.
“Max, give it back!”
“There are some really cool concepts in here.” He muses aloud as he pushes away from me, holding the arm of my chair so that I’m trapped behind the desk. “Like, really cool. I’ve read a lot of manuscripts that are well written but have no original thought. These are original.”
“You know for a stranger you’re really quite happy to just insert yourself into my life, aren’t you?” I throw my hands up in exasperation as I kick back in my chair, giving up the fight while he grins and flicks to a new page.
“You ever tried to publish?”
“No.” I turn back to my computer, suddenly feeling the weight of vulnerability as he scrutinises the characters and concepts I’ve spent countless hours scribbling tiny little lives for.
“Why?” He focuses in on an idea I half conceived this morning and grabs a highlighter and pen from my desk, marking phrases for me and adding notes.
“Nothing ever stuck enough to finish it, I guess.” The phone, now glowing with a small red light, flashes up at us and I hold a finger up to Max, taking a deep breath.
“Yes?” I hook the phone between my ear and my shoulder and grimace at the voice on the line, despite knowing it is his extension.
“I was thinking of grabbing an early lunch. Jamie’s busy.” Ben spins on his desk chair in his office when I turn to face him and watches me through the window. “Join me?”
I can feel Max watching me as my eyes bug and I spin back to face the front of the office.
