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Not that I ever could. My mother had made sure of that, forcing us all to take a vow to never kill each other. We were too useful to her.
I had managed only the two mouthfuls of syllabub when she rose from the table, and my breath caught in my throat as I stood up quickly with my brothers. My vision danced for a moment when I straightened, pulling on the deep wound in my thigh.
Cethlen’s head cocked beside me. My mother had already swept out of the room when he said, “You’re breathing rather fast, Lonan.”
His voice was soft, but sly. Just like he was. The quiet one, always listening, but that didn’t make him any less conniving.
“Are you injured?” he asked demurely, but his thin lips twisted into a cruel smirk.
“Our Lonan?” Balor laughed easily, sauntering round the table. He slapped me hard on the back, directly over the wound, making my vision white out entirely for a few seconds. “Who would be quick enough to injure him?”
He gripped the back of my neck with clawing fingers and shoved me towards the door. “I’ll walk you to your room, little brother. We’ll catch up before you retire for the night.”
The muscle in my jaw ticked furiously, but I couldn’t reach up and wrench his hand free—not without tearing open the fragile new tissue knitting the wounds on my chest and back together. I fought hard not to limp, even as the deep gash on my thigh threatened to split back open.
“Didn’t want your dessert?” Balor said softly as he directed me across the side hall and up the wide, sweeping staircase to our living quarters. “Has something diminished your appetite?”
I said nothing, clenching my teeth so hard my jaw throbbed.
“If you know where he is, it would be in your best interests to tell me,” Balor hissed in my ear, his fingers digging hard into my neck.
“I don’t,” I answered honestly, then couldn’t help but add, “And if I did, I’d cut out my tongue before telling you.”
There was no point pretending otherwise. Balor knew everything. He had guessed much, but it had been the indisputable facts he had already known that led him to the truth.
He knew that I had wanted Ash for years. Since the very first moment I saw him, when we were both boys. He knew that my greatest weakness was my love for him. And he used that weakness for his own gain, as all fae would.
“Whatwouldmother say if she knew you had helped him escape?” Balor said softly, leading me down the corridor towards my room. “Do you think she suspects, dear brother? That you weren’t just fucking him to spite his bitch mother?”
I swallowed, staying silent. I didn’t know how Balor knew about what had grown between Ash and me. Maybe he had just guessed and Ash’s betrayed, agonised look in the throne room that terrible night had confirmed it.
Had he watched us? Spied on us when we were together? The thought alone was enough to make my fingers twitch with the desire to tear his eyes out with my bare hands.
“Do you think she is in her chamber at this moment, wondering where your loyalties lie?” Balor continued, his cold breath tickling my ear.
“Threats won’t work,” I said, unable to keep the weariness out of my voice. “Tell her or don’t. I don’t care.”
“I think you’d care if she ordered you to track down your little seelie dog and slit his throat.”
Cold fury tightened my chest, sending fresh agony through my wound. “Call him that again and I’ll slit yours.”
Balor laughed, the sound cruel. “If only you could. I’m sure your fingers are itching for your blade.”
He wrenched me closer to hiss in my ear, “Did you fuck him as the wolf? Did he like it?”
My teeth felt like they would crack. “I vow to you, Balor, that I will—”
“Come now, Lonan,” he tutted, releasing my neck to fist my hair and yank my head back, making the wound on my chest strain. “You know better than to trap yourself in vows that are impossible to fulfil.”
He let go and shoved me towards my bedroom door, placing his hand directly on the wound on my back, as if he knew exactly where it was. “Sleep well, little brother.”
