AllFreeNovel
Share Us
She let herself in and found Becky, Zoe, and Brandon all nestled on the couch. They’d make a good-looking family—not that she’d be saying anything of the sort. While Amanda didn’t know how her friend felt about having children of her own, she couldn’t really see it. Becky was such an independent spirit and loved her freedom. Though she had kept Brandon around longer than any other boyfriend, despite their rough patches.
“Hey, guys,” Amanda said softly, noticing how Zoe was lying across the couch—her head on Becky’s lap, her feet on Brandon’s, and her favorite stuffed dog, Sir Lucky, gripped closely to her chest.
“Hey,” Becky and Brandon chortled back. Zoe whimpered and twisted. She never opened her eyes.
“Sorry to keep you so long. I can’t thank you enough.”
Becky waved her off. “Don’t mention it.” She carefully peeled herself out from under Zoe and made it to a standing position without disturbing her.
Brandon did his best to imitate Becky’s moves but wasn’t as successful. Zoe bolted upright and blinked wildly, looking around the room like her eyes were trying to adjust into focus. Her gaze landed on Amanda and immediately her eyes lit up.
“Amanda.” Zoe hopped off the couch and ran to her. She threw her arms around her legs before Amanda was able to get down to her level.
“Well, we’re going to head out,” Becky said, nearing the front door and slipping into her shoes.
Brandon was grabbing their coats from the coatrack, already in his shoes. He held Becky’s jacket out for her to slip into, then put on his own. Amanda hadn’t taken to Brandon at first. He was arrogant and cocky, past the point of confidence. He also worked with an ex-girlfriend of his, which Amanda didn’t like one bit, but he’d assured Becky the relationship was long over. Amanda didn’t trust the situation—especially when Brandon and his team were often jetting across the United States. They were hunting serial killers, not exactly fodder for romance, but still…
Amanda would now admit, though, that she’d come to cautiously like the guy. He had helped her with a previous investigation, sharing his expertise on serial killers. And he couldn’t be that bad of a person if he was willing to babysit on one of the rare occasions that he was home and not on the road.
“Bye, sweetie.” Becky waved at Zoe from the front door, and Zoe waved back from where she was, clinging to Amanda’s leg.
“Bye,” Amanda said to Becky and Brandon.
They shut the door behind them, and Amanda went over and threw the deadbolt. She turned and faced Zoe. Now the girl’s arms were hanging at her sides, and Lucky was dangling by an ear.
“I’m thinking it’s time we got you into bed.”
“Okay.” It came out as a mumble.
Amanda held out her hand for Zoe to take, and they walked down the hall to her room. There were times when it arrested Amanda’s heart to cross the threshold with Zoe, knowing that the space they were about to enter had once been Lindsey’s. It still held memories of her daughter. The walls were the same soft pink, and the curtains remained the same. Some of her toys were around. The Barbie picnic that had been going on for years had ended. The dolls were now stacked in a small tote in the closet. Zoe sometimes played with them.
The coloring book Lindsey had been working on was tucked away in Amanda’s bedroom closet. The pages would forever remain her daughter’s alone. She couldn’t bring herself to part with the book altogether. She let Zoe use the crayons in her own coloring books that had been brought over from her family home, along with other toys and books. The furniture had been swapped out—Lindsey’s was piled in the garage and Zoe’s brought in. The bedroom was a mishmash of Zoe and Lindsey—and that was the best Amanda could hope for. It hadn’t been an easy process, though necessary to move forward. They say forgiveness is hard, but acceptance was equally so.
Amanda pulled back the comforter and sheets, and Zoe crawled into the bed, but she didn’t lie down. She sat with her back against the headboard, her legs and stomach covered.
“Will you read to me?”
Amanda tucked some of Zoe’s long, blond hair behind an ear and smiled. “I’d love to but it’s getting late, and you’re tired.” She poked Zoe’s nose playfully.
Zoe giggled and swiped her hand away. “I’m awake.” She was looking at Amanda with those blue eyes of hers that were nearly electric.
Amanda scooted Zoe over and sat on the edge of the bed, grabbing the book they’d been reading from the nightstand.
“Yay!” Zoe clapped her hands, releasing her hold on Lucky. It catapulted Amanda back to a time when the girl never let it out of her hand. Then again, Zoe and Lucky had been through a lot together. Zoe had been with the doll in the storage ottoman at the time of her parents’ murders, when she’d witnessed her father’s shooting.
Amanda flipped open to where they’d left off the night before. They were reading Alice in Wonderland, a special edition with stunning illustrations and lots of text.
“Down the rabbit hole we go,” Amanda said and began to read.
She continued until Zoe’s head started lolling forward, her little chin dipping to her chest. “All right, sweetheart. Time for your own adventures.”
Zoe shuffled down the bed, the covers coming to her chin. Amanda positioned Lucky so the dog’s head was also above the sheets, and pecked a kiss on the girl’s forehead. She flicked off the main light, turned on one that cast stars onto the ceiling—another item that had been Lindsey’s—and left the room, leaving the door open a crack.
She stepped into the hall and leaned against the wall, feeling incredibly blessed. It was as if the slate was wiped clean, and all the nasty things that she’d seen since leaving home that morning had disappeared. Sadly, Amanda knew this euphoria would be fleeting. The moment her head hit her pillow, the ugly would wash over her again. But until then, she’d savor this sweet moment.
