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CHAPTER EIGHTEEN
FABIEN
I've given her plenty of time.
So why is she still here?
I watch her through the windows. Down in the garden, she works at the flowers with Gabrielle. Gabrielle, who’d slice her in two if she knew what she really was. Anyone in this house would.
If Kyran knew, he’d lose his mind. I can just hear him now: thisis exactly what would make your father choose Octavian over you!
And he'd be right.
If my father knew, if he knew I let her stay...lether live...he'd be furious. He’d disown me, and choose Octavian as his heir immediately. All the work I've done these past months, gone.
Among the Raidh, it’d be as if I never existed. My name would be forever struck from their membership. My rank of prince, earned by my mother's sacrifice, gone, to waste on someone like Octavian.
I watch her again. Her perfect face, radiant and smiling. Her tawny hair tumbling over her shoulders in curls. The soft curves of her body, reminding me of the bond we share.
Of the power only she can give me.
I've known for so long that something was missing from my life. From myheart. But I never knew how much I’d gain by finding her. Or how much I’d lose now that I can’t have her.
My fist crashes into the wall, rattling a vase on the mantel. The windows shudder, and the curtains billow a little with the pressure of the blow. When I remove my hand, a neat impression reveals itself. Four knuckles the size of walnuts, the curve of my fingers. The spines on the back of my hand carve neat holes in the ancient wood of the wall.
My rage and sorrow goes nowhere. All I've done is attract attention.
The two ladies in the garden look up. The racket I've made is audible even that far off.
Gabrielle looks confused. Mia --Lily-- looks sad.
Lily gazes at me, meeting my eyes without fear. Her mouth opens as if she might speak, or offer her lips to me. But I doubt that’ll ever happen again.
She's a cop. They don't kiss monsters.
I hear Kyran coming up the stairs. I know his footfalls as well as my own. My tentacles feel the vibration in the air as he approaches.
"The butler asked me to see if you'd gone crazy," Kyran says softly. He's making fun of me, in a way I'd normally respond to, but today I just don't feel it. "What's going on, boss? Your tentacles look melancholy today."
"Kyran..."
He closes the door. I rub my temples in exasperation. Not with him. Withmyself. I'd wanted to be alone, and now I've made it so I can't be. I've frightened the household staff.
"Carter says it's like the old days this past week. Like when you got back from boarding school the first time. When nobody really knew you, and you scared the hell out of everyone. I told him that was crazy talk. You're the same big lovable mass of tentacles and horror you've always been."
Kyran leans over the dent in the wall my fist made.
"Although this is new. You haven't punched a wall in a while. Hell, you didn't even make it all the way through. It's like you're losing your touch."
I seethe and a growl bubbles in my throat.
"I could’ve gone through the wall if I'd wanted to," I grumble.
"Sure, sure. This happens to everybody. I'd know. I was with a girl last week and I could barely--"
"Enough!"
My bellowing voice rattles the windows again.
